Yaz walked into the shower and pressed her lips to Doctor's shoulder blade running hands gently down her waist. Doctor took her hand and wrapped it around herself pressing it to her chest. Neither of them spoke a word, just stood underneath the warm water running down between them. They had a beautiful day on the beach, but the pain of recent events was still lingering in the air and Yaz knew Doctor was blaming herself for all of it.
Yaz dotted kisses across her back and trailed her fingers down her sides. Doctor turned around and moved the wet hair from Yaz's face kissing her gently then kissed the bruises on her wrists that were still there from the rope.

"It's fine, it doesn't hurt" she said glancing up

"They shouldn't be there in a first place"

"I know...but we are both here now, and that's the most important thing" she placed her hand on her hip and pushed her gently to the edge of the shower until her back hit the wall. She was moving with intent and Doctor pulled back.

"Yaz you can't"

"Shhhhh..." she put a finger over her lips "But you can...just don't fall" she smiled and sink her lips into hers. Doctor wrapped her fingers at the back of her head deepening the kiss. Yaz trailed her hands down her sides and pressed her more against the stone wall slipping her hand between her thighs.

"You don't have to..."

"But I really want to" she kissed her again and Doctor grabbed the tap on the wall hoping to God, she doesn't rip it out of the wall as Yaz draped one of her legs over her side. Yet again she thought how bed would be a lot easier, but Yaz had a thing about pinning her against the walls. Not that she was complaining. Her head bumped the wall when she slipped inside her without the warning her lips traveled down her neck and shoulder. She was gentle, moving in a slow steady rhythm kissing her gently and Doctor melted into her arms. She needed her more than she was willing to admit it to herself. Yaz's soft kisses on her skin and her hand stroking the back of neck gently. She needed to know she wasn't alone more than anything else because being alone scared her the most.

"Yaz be faster...please...I can't"

"Stand?" Yaz laughed

"Cheeky bugger" she grinned and kissed her hard whimpering into her lips as Yaz did exactly as she asked. She slumped her head on her shoulder as she was pulling her apart shuddering in her arms.

"I love you so much" she looked at Yaz with dreamy eyes dotting kisses over her face and
stood up on wobbly legs leaning on Yaz's shoulder.

"I love you too...you look a mess Doctor" Yaz giggled and Doctor sleekly turned the water to cold making Yaz scream giggling

They dried themselves off and crawled into bed. Yaz's hair was still a little damp because the hair dryer wasn't working properly and she kept forgetting to say something at the front desk, but the room was warm, so it didn't matter. She curled up against the Doctor's back kissing her shoulders and pulled the covers over their heads. In most cases it would be the Doctor pressing herself on her back and slowly running her hand over her until she fell asleep, but today she knew that the Doctor needed a cuddle, and she wouldn't object to Yaz giving it to her. She rarely asked for one though but would never refuse it.

Yaz knew even before they were together that the Doctor liked to be cuddled. It was written all over her face in the rare moments she would relent. Like when they were watching movies together and Yaz could have sworn the Tardis turned the temperature down on purpose, so they had to be under the covers together. And only once did the Doctor fall asleep and put her hand over Yaz's waist, pulling her head into the back of her neck, which made Yaz's heart jump out of her chest. She had never told her that, not even now that they were together. It was her sweet little secret. They fell asleep together on the sofa that night huddled together, but when Yaz woke up the next morning, the Doctor was gone and she never talked about it, never mentioned it. The next day she kept dropping things around Yaz and avoiding eye contact, she even shorted the control panel and had to fix it. Then shortly after that Flux came along and they got split up.

And now she was hers, every inch of her belonged to Yaz's lips and she had a part of her inside her. But Yaz's heart would still skip a beat every time she felt her pressing on her, only now it wouldn't be from fear, but from the love she felt for her that was so strong she would literally lose her breath just thinking about it.

"Hey darling, tell me a story" Yaz said leaning on her shoulder her hand over her chest and their fingers laced together tight "You didn't tell me a story for a long time. I think last time was before Egypt"

"Yeah, you got a point Yaz. We haven't done this in a long time...Alright beautiful what do you wanna know?"

"Tell me about Rome and the Pompey. You said something about Tardis being stolen"

"Aaaaa that...yes...that was a long time ago. I was traveling with Donna then. She was such a sweetheart and so funny. You would like her Yaz... she told me off each time. Really yelling at me as well"

"OMG...What did you do to her for god's sake?"

"You know me Yaz...I can really be impossible"

"Mmm...confession" she smiled kissing her neck squeezing her

"Only to you Yaz...don't ever tell anyone" She chuckled

"My lips are sealed" she giggled "Mostly on you though"

"I like your lips sealed on me Yaz, I will never complain about that"

"Tell me...Donna you and Pompey"

 

 

Doctor was talking late into the night and took them both to another time, another land and universe. Yaz loved hearing about her past lives, the people she met, things she did and the people she loved. She fell asleep with her head resting on the nape of her neck. Doctor knew when she drifted away when she twitched her hand and grabbed onto her finger. So, she kissed her knuckles and tried to sleep herself.

                                                                                                               ...

"Babe what are those papers?" Yaz asked as they were packing and saw them laying on a bed

"Eye of the Deep...blueprints. I have something in mind"

"Why do you need them?"

"Planet that Shar came from Yaz, they need that machine...I'm gonna build it for them"

"You whaa?"

"Yap...with your dad" she grinned

"Say what?" Yaz turned around confused

"You heard it right...I called him this morning...we are picking up you family Yaz in few days...You up for family trip?"

Yaz cracked up laughing "Your crazy you know that?"

"I know it's great" she grinned kissing her cheek

They dropped the boys' home and now the Tardis was empty again with just the two of them. The soft lights of the console illuminated the Doctor's face as she stood hunched over it with her shirt sleeves rolled up, loading blueprints into the Tardis program. Yaz watched her in silence from the corner of the corridor. Her beautiful little wife was once again working to save someone's life out there. She wondered how many lives she had saved without anyone knowing. She never asked for anything for herself, she never complained about her pain and her loneliness and those she lost. She wondered how many times someone had hurt her, and she regenerated in pain surrounded only by the silence of the Tardis without anyone knowing about it, then came out of her little box with a new face smiling like the pain didn't exist. She remembered that first night on the train and the cheerful little Time Lord she met. She never dreamed how much pain and hurt there was in that soul, she never dreamed how desperately she needed to be held like the other night in the hotel room when she melted into her touch. And yet in all the endless universe there was never anyone to hold her. So Yaz made it her mission to compensate for the long years of loneliness and all the nights in an empty bed and all the tears she shed with no one to wipe them from her face. She promised herself that she would wipe away the last drop of pain with her lips and all the loneliness with her hands.

Yaz came down the stairs and the Doctor glanced at her smiling slightly. She walked up behind her sliding her arms around her chest kissing her shoulder.

"Hey, you should rest you know" Doctor said

"I am resting" she rubbed her face over her back and Doctor rested her hand over hers smiling

"Hey look...I wanted to show this. It's amazing Yaz and we are going to build it" she opened the screen showing the machine in its full glory.

"Who made it love? Where did it come from?"

"I don't know darling...But I would love to meet them. Apart from Tardis I've never seen anything more beautiful, more sophisticated...a machine developed to such a high degree of complexity it's amazing Yaz"

"And where are you gonna build it?"

"I contacted Zwari, Shar's planet they are expecting us. We will work together until it's done"

"I spoke with Dad...he is beside himself...did you know Sonya and Ryan are coming?"

She turned around grinning

"Babeee" she giggled ruffling her hair "You're so cheeky...you knew before you left Ryan home"

"I did...I spoke to him last night in a kitchen" she laughed "Happy?"

"I can't wait to see my family...I miss them...it's been five weeks"

"I know...I'm counting by munchkin...she's 26 weeks now Yaz"

"That's crazy...where did the time go?"

"I know Yaz five months to go and you're popping"

"I'm nervous about it I can't think"

Doctor turned around and slipped her arms around her "It's going to be fine...I promise" she kissed her forehead

"Easy for you to say" she laughed

"Believe me I get panic attacks as well Yaz...I'm just not saying it. But I'll be there next to you...all the way"

"You better be or I'm keeping her inside me until you are" she laughed

Doctor tucked her hair behind her ear and kissed her forehead "Come on beautiful...you need to rest now. Long day tomorrow"

"You're staying, aren't you?" she glanced at the console behind her

"As it happens no... I think I can finish later"

"Really?" Yaz flashed a big smile not believing Doctor is actually going to bed with her

"Yeah" she reached for her hand pulling her away from the console "I need a cuddle Yaz" ...

Yaz stood in front of the mirror running her hand over her stomach then lifted her top and lowered baggy pajama bottoms to have a better look. It was big and she was so proud of it. She was also still trying to calm down from what happened, and she was glad they are going to be alone for few days before picking up her family. She needed her wife and just them two together on their little planet far away amongst the stars.

 

The Doctor came out of the bathroom patting in her little boxers and a t-shirt, hopping around the room on her cute skinny legs and taking the earring out of her ear leaving it on the side table then walking up to Yaz kissing her shoulder and hugging her. "Look Yaz, soon I'm not gonna be able to reach around you" she said looking in the mirror over her shoulder

"I know...she's growing so fast she's gonna topple me over soon" she leaned on her chest with a big sigh "God it's so nice to be back home with you"

"I was just thinking that...Come on let's go to bed it's really late" she took her hand pulling her to bed and Yaz couldn't help pinching her bum as she turned around "Oi...keep your hands to yourself" Doctor frowned messing around 

"It's just so cute I can't help it" she giggled

"I assure you there's nothing cute about my behind Yaz" she said climbing the bed

"I strongly disagree...it's the cutest thing ever"

"You silly sod...get into bed"

They snuggled up and Yaz buried her face into the duvet that smell of home. The soft hum of the Tardis and the dim lights of their bedroom finally calmed her. She felt safe inside the Tardis and safety suddenly took on a whole new meaning. She looked at the cradle in the corner and imagined that in five months there would be a new life in it, a part of the two of them, of their love. It made her emotional and she wasn't sure if it was her hormones or just the events of the past few days, but she suddenly felt like crying so she turned and buried her head in the Doctor's neck, wrapping an arm around her and a leg around her hip.

"Hey...are you ok?" she asked combing fingers through her hair

"I am now...I love you" she mumbled into her neck kissing it

"I know Yaz...it shook me too. As much as we both want to forget it's still at the back of my mind. But time is healing beautiful, and it will go away I promise"

"Can you do something for me?"

"Anything love"

"Now when go there, if we will sleep someplace else, can you keep Tardis in our room?" she looked up

"Yes...Of course I can darling" she kissed her softly and ran her hand over her face "It will be right there next to you. Come on love please try to sleep, you both need rest"

"I love you so much" Yaz said inch away from her lips gazing at her, her eyes trying to stop the tears

"And I love you more than anything in the universe, both of you" she kissed her again and pushed her head gently back into her neck

One thing Doctor released at this point was just how shaken Yaz really was and how much she was trying to keep it together. She wrapped her hands around her and kissed her head then started telling her a story to make her fall asleep.

                                                                                                      ....

"Morning" Yaz came to the console room eating her cereal. She was still in her pajamas and a dressing gown.

"Aaaaa...morning" Doctor waived from underneath the console and pulled herself out

Yaz left her cereal on a side and lifted her goggles on top of her head kissing her "Sexy" she giggled smacking her bum

"Blimey Yaz...I'm hardly sexy covered in engine oil"

"Mmmm" Yaz lifted an eyebrow "super sexy"

Doctor shook her head laughing

"Repairing or just general maintenance?" she asked sitting in her armchair in a corner

"Maintenance Yaz...We don't want to be stuck somewhere with you family...That would be really embarrassing"

"You mean like Egypt?" she laughed

"Mmmm" she nodded and hid behind the console pretending she's got something really serious to do there "That was not my fault Yaz"

"I never said it was love"

"Hey...you wanna go for a walk later? It's snowing but I checked this morning and snow is not that deep"

"Yeah, alright then...I missed this place. Can we pleaseeee go to the cave before I pop?"

Doctor peaked from underneath the console "Sure Yaz I did promise you...We can go when we come back from the trip if you'd like? We have enough time"

"I do...I really do wanna go"

"Alright darling you don't need to beg me Yaz. I'd take you anywhere you know that. I still need to show you those pink beaches I really want you to see them. But we can do that when we come back. And the water there is really excellent for your condition"

"My condition?" she laughed

Doctor zoomed around the console and took a wrench from the floor "Yeah...pregnancy Yaz"

"Mmmmm" she giggled eating her cereal enjoying in a view of the Doctor's bum in the air whilst squeezing herself underneath the console in a tiny hole to reach some valve

"Are you looking at my bum Yaz?" Doctor peaked sideways frowning

"Yeeees" she laughed like crazy almost choking on her breakfast

"Seriously Yaz...What have I done to you"

"Knocked me up babe" she laughed

Doctor laid on her back and squeezed herself underneath laughing at all times "I must say Yaz I missed this"

"Missed what darling?"

"You and me, alone. See I feel myself when I'm with you Yaz, It's nice. I can't feel that around anyone else" she got up throwing the wrench on the floor and taking her gloves off "There...all done Yaz. Well...hopefully. I should be fine. I need a shower"

"Aaaaa...she kicked me so hard" Yaz lifted her top

"She did?" Doctor jumped and ran across "Let me see Yaz...Aaaaarhhh...I have dirty hands"

"Oh, who cares...give your hand" she took her hand and placed it on her stomach then opened the hologram from her bracelet "Loook...she's turning"

"Yaz...I'm pretty certain I'm going to cry now" she said bending over holding her hand on her tummy

"Cry you silly sod...I'm gonna cry with you"

"Yaz, I made that baby...her...she's mine" she was literally hopping on one place exited

"You have yes" she smiled and pulled her in for a kiss.

Yaz found it funny how the Doctor still couldn't get her head around it after all these months even though the evidence for it was now so blatantly obvious. She wondered if, when the baby comes, she would just stand by her for hours and think about the same thing, and she could see her banging on about it about three times a day and telling her daughter how she made her.

 

"She's going to move now more and more Yaz...I mean she always did move, but you just couldn't feel her as much. But now, bigger she is more you will feel and see as well. You will see on a tummy when she stretches her little leg or when you get a tiny fist in your bladder" she laughed crouching down and put her ear on Yaz's stomach

"Babe, I think that's my digestion you can hear not her" Yaz laughed combing fingers through Doctor's hair

"I think she might have gone back to sleep" she opened one eye squinting at Yaz with her ear still pressed on her stomach

"You're so silly" Yaz shook her head giggling "My lovable weardo"

"Come on Yaz go get dressed. Let's go for a walk before it gets dark. Remember days are short now and it's coming up to twelve o'clock already"

"Alright love" she passed her the breakfast bowl and reached out for her hand to get up.

                                                                                                                ...

They stepped outside and the Doctor pulled the hood over Yaz's head making sure she was wrapped up warm. She had to get a new jacket because she could no longer zip up the old one. A reminder of how much bigger she was than the last time they were home. It was a strange feeling how Yaz now considered this distant planet her home. Earth was too, but this was her heart's home now, the one they had chosen for themselves. The Doctor was also wearing a thick winter coat for a change, but her lower legs were still bare and Yaz felt cold just looking at them. She laced their fingers and showed their hands in her pocket. They walked slowly along their usual path through the frozen forest. It was quiet, only their feet made a sound as they walked through the thick snow.

"Hey Yaz look!" Doctor pointed to the beautiful rainbow lights in the sky

"OMG are those polar lights"

"Similar yes...they are stunning"

"So magical" Yaz said smiling and then saw a beautiful white bird in the branches of the tree. She tapped Doctor's shoulder "Hey...loook" she pointed

"Aaaa...I haven't seen them in centuries" she whispered

"What is it? OMG look at those eyes" she was gasped at the piercing big blue eyes

"Similar to owls Yaz...stunning. They are very rare because they only have one baby each ten years"

"How come?"

"They live over six hundred years Yaz, nature's way of keeping a balance"

"Waaaw...I'm so emotional babe...why do I feel like crying?"

"Oh boy" she turned towards her and smiled "I think your hormones going a bit crazy. Like you know...you're preparing to be a mum"

"Oh god I'm either crying or I'm horny this is horrible"

Doctor burst out laughing and kissed her forehead "Come on mummy...let's go back it's getting late"

"Anyways the bird is beautiful" she smiled, and one tear dropped down her cheek.

They continued walking for nearly an hour before turning around to go back to the Tardis.

"Be careful darling don't slip" Doctor said as they came back inside "Your boots are full of snow. Hold on to me I'll take them off"

"I needed this...and now I need some tea" she said holding on to her shoulders "Want some?"

"Definitely" she said pulling her boots of "Here we go...all done...go down and don't be barefoot"

"Yes mum" she giggled

"Just making sure you two don't get ill Yaz that's all"

"I know and you're gorgeous" she said hopping along towards the kitchen "Oh look you have a message from your best mate love" she said passing next to the console

"I do?" she asked confused taking her jacket off and shaking a snow off it "Who's my best mate?"

"My dad" she laughed and zoomed of to the kitchen

"Baaaaabe!!!!" Yaz yelled from the kitchen then came to the hallway "Why is kitchen covered in water?"

"Whaaa?"

"We have a flood babe"

"Why does everything always have to go wrong Yaz...tell me"  she walked irritated towards the kitchen

"No idea darling...actually I do babe...you're a shit magnet" she laughed

"Blimey....what the hell" Doctor stood at the door looking at the kitchen floor covered in water up to her calves "What's going on here...oh don't tell me swimming pool leaked again" she walked through the water and the spark flew off in the corner

"OMG! get out of there...you're gonna get electrocuted"

"There's no electricity inside Tardis Yaz...don't worry...I wanted a nice quiet evening just you and me and now I need to repair this...Aaaarrhh"

"We can still have it babe...I'll help you. Go have a look what's going on I'll sort out this water"

"You will do no such thing Yaz. Tardis can suck up the water out don't worry. But this will take time...I'm so sorry" she slumped her shoulders

"Why are you saying sorry that's so silly come on. We will do it together" she reached for her hand

                                                                                                           ...

"See look inside here Yaz can you see that little valve there?" she said pointing at the deep hole in the wall

"Yap"

"Close it clockwise when I say?"

"Alright. Why did my dad call you?"

"Nothing important Yaz, just for a chat"

"You're just having a casual chat with my dad?"

"Yeah...why not?" she shrugs hopping around "You can open it now Yaz...and your sister"

"You whaa?"

"She calls me once a week just to give an update"

Yaz rolls her eyes laughing "I can't believe this...Wait a minute...did you say once a week"

"Mmmmm"

She walks over to her and turns her face with her finger "So you knew about her and Ryan?"

Doctor grins and then hops away on the other side "Hey look at this Yaz I always wanted to show this...this is how I add rooms"

"That's interesting but you're not changing the subject"

"I can't tell a secret Yaz...it's not fair"

"Not even to me when it's my sister and my mate dating each other?"

"Yaz I am not getting into your family drama...You're gonna have to take that one with your sister"

"I'm your wife!"

"You are...that's true" she moves to another side pulling some wires out of the wall

"Don't I come first?"

"Oi...that's not fair Yaz...you always come first. But if your sister doesn't want to tell you maybe you shouldn't be blaming me Yaz"

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"You should ask yourself why she's telling me and not you"

"I don't understand"

Doctor left the wires and turned to her "Yaz you haven't been very supportive you know. Ryan said he loves her, and he feels he can be himself with her...you know...talk about everything he`s been through. Has it ever crossed your mind how difficult it must be for him. He can't exactly say to a random girl how terrifying it is to meet a Cyberman Yaz or how much Orphan 55 practically traumatized him. But he can to your sister. She understands...they share this world Yaz...Just put yourself in their shoes" she got back to her wires leaving Yaz standing feeling horrible about herself. She turned around and walked away

"Yaz!" Doctor yelled as she walked out "Oh boy" she rolled her eyes and wiped her hands on her sides then went after her

Yaz was sitting on the steps by the console twirling the edge of her sleeve through her fingers looking at the floor. She felt horrible and selfish, and she knew Doctor was right. She also remembered how much it hurt when her sister kept taking a piss out of Doctor and their relationship and how she apologized to her in the end. But when Yaz looked back she was no different to Ryan or to Sonya.

"Yaz" Doctor walked in "Hey don't sit on the cold stairs you're gonna ketch a cold"

"I'm fine" she moves her bum a bit to show she's sitting on a cushion

"Yaz" Doctor sits next to her "Darling I didn't mean to upset you"

"I know"

"I was trying to explain. I'm not hiding stuff from you Yaz, but I have to also respect your sister. It's not a nice position to be in because I love you and I want to tell you everything"

"I understand"

"Do you Yaz? Because right now you don't look like you do, you just look like you're gonna cry...your chin is having a wobbling moment...right there" she pointed her finger making Yaz laugh a bit.

"I do understand...and you're right. I'm sorry I lashed out on you"

"It's ok I'll survive...nothing kiss can't repair Yaz" she said so obviously waiting for one to come her way and it did immediately afterwards

"I'm so sorry I yelled" she said into her lips

"Aaaaa...That feels better" The Doctor hugged her shoulder and pulled her into her "You can always talk to them both you know...we're going on a trip together

"Is that why you called them?" Yaz looked at her

"I might have done" she smiled and kissed her forehead

                                                                                                             ...

Kitchen was dry and Tardis repaired. Yaz finally got to making a tea. She put mugs and custard cream biscuits on the tray.

"Hey...I have the movie ready" Doctor peaked from the door smiling "Uh...no no I'll take that Yaz" she rushed to take the tray "What if you tripped Yaz?"

Yaz laughed "Babe I think I'm perfectly capable of caring the tray"

"Nope...you can't see your feet Yaz...you said it yourself" she took the tray and walked out

They came to the library, Yaz's favorite place in the Tardis. Doctor prepared the sofa and the big screen. The fire was crackling in the fireplace and smell of books and wood with dimmed lights made it all very cozy. They made themselves comfy snuggled up on a big sofa. Yaz found this incredibly special because for years she was yearning this kind of closeness with the Doctor and now when she's all hers Yaz was using every opportunity to snuggle as much as it was physically possible. But she also noticed Doctor was no different than her. Her hands were on Yaz any given moment sometimes just brushing gently on her passing by and Yaz loved every second of it.

 

"Mmmm....look we have a tray" Yaz laughed wedging a plate between her stomach and her breast.

"You silly sod"

"My boobs are so much bigger my god...Did you notice that?"

Doctor laughed shaking her head "Yes Yaz believe me I have. You look beautiful darling"

Yaz fell asleep halfway through the movie. The sofa was big and cozy and fitted both of them perfectly. She turned around at some point and tucked her head into Doctor's chest wrapping her arm around her. This was one of those lazy beautiful evenings when it was just the two of them and Tardis and was Doctor's favorite. As much as she loved having family and friends around, she was also craving for alone time with Yaz and yet she found herself constantly again traveling surrounded by people. She decided that this was going to be their last trip before the baby comes, more so because Yaz's pregnancy was slowly coming to term, and she didn't want to take any risks anymore.

"Yaz...darling" she kissed her hairline

"Mmmmm?"

"You fell asleep...come on. Let's go to bedroom"

"Mmmm"

Doctor smiled "Wanna stay here?"

"Mmmmm" she rubbed her face into her neck

She chuckled "Alright...I suppose we can stay" she took the remote and found another movie to watch

                                                                                                           ...

"How are my favorite girls this morning?" Doctor came to the kitchen kissing her shoulder and then capturing her lips as Yaz was chopping some banana

"Still trying to find my brain" she laughed and put a piece of banana into her mouth "Want some cereal?"

"Might do...that looks yummy" she peaked over her shoulder

"What are you doing since five in the morning? I woke up and you were gone"

"Studding that machine...it's so amazing Yaz I can't wait to get my hands on it. It can actually provide enough energy source for the whole planet and not just one hemisphere. I found the way of adapting it"

"Waaaw...it's absolutely amazing when you think. What happened to that planet babe?"

"Solar storms are getting stronger Yaz, they are destroying their atmosphere. Stronger they get more exposed they will get to radiation"

"Oh...I can't imagine something like that happening to Earth...well I can but it gives me the creeps.... Here you go babe, your cereal"

"Thanks...mmmm that looks yummy. Well, technically Yaz each planet will eventually come to same faith. It just you know...takes time...a lot of time"

"I wanna talk to you about something"

"You look very serious Yaz...what is it?"

"Well, you know how we talked about baby names"

"Yes"

"Well now we know it's a girl. I had this name popping in my head that I thought was very beautiful and also meaningful"

The Doctor leaned her head on her hand intrigued "Okay...let's hear Yaz...now I'm excited

She left the knife on the counter and looked up to her "Anaya...it's Indian, name and it means..."

"Completely Free" Doctor finished her sentence

"Yes" she smiled

"I absolutely love it Yaz"

"You do?" she asked all exited

"I do" she nodded happily "There's a power in that name Yaz...nothing in this universe is more powerful than love and freedom"

"But iff you have any other ideas love I don't want this to be..."

"It's perfect Yaz"

"Sooo, does that mean we have our baby's name?"

Doctor got up and took her hands "I think it does mummy" she nodded smiling

"You do know I'm gonna start crying now again?" she smiled with a bottom lip wobbling

"I know you're getting a wobble" she cupped her face and kissed her gently then pulled her into her chest "I absolutely love it Yaz" she then slumped down and started tapping on her stomach "Hey did you hear that...we have a name for you...Anaya...do you like it? One tap for yes and two taps for no"

"You're absolutely insane babe" she started giggling

"I figured Yaz she's way too small for two taps so it will have to be YES"

"Are you being cheeky with the baby?"

"Yeeees" she laughed

                                                                                                               ...

It was the day before the trip and Yaz was nervous. She suddenly felt nervous about leaving the safety of the Tardis and it was an extremely strange feeling as she had never been nervous about anything before. On the contrary, she would have endless arguments with the Doctor about what she can or cannot do while pregnant and would have serious problems accepting the restrictions that pregnancy has placed on her. To be honest half the time she knew the Doctor was right and she knew she was being stubborn. She also knew the Doctor knew she was getting on her nerves quite consciously which made things worse when they argued because one thing Yaz couldn't do was win the argument with the Doctor. To be honest, she hasn't met a single person who could, with one exception, her mum. The Doctor would literally shut up every time to Yaz's absolute astonishment when her mum argues her corner. And she had never seen her do it with anyone else. Actually, Yaz's mum just didn't care that the Doctor was an alien thousands of years old, she would put her foot down like she was talking to a 30-year-old woman letting her know she's the mother. And in some strange way the Doctor took to it and would like the idea of ​​having a mother figure in her life. It was beautiful and special for Yaz because it was the bond the Doctor had with her family that meant the world to her. But her thoughts went back to her anxiety of leaving for this trip and usually she would brush over it and not say anything, but she desperately needed her.

Doctor was lying on the floor with her head deep inside the console. She was tapping her hand over the floor trying to find the tools that were right beside her. Yaz laughed and moved the pliers in her reach.

"Oh...Yaz...I didn't see you there...I though you're packing?" she asked with her head still stuck underneath the console

"I was...babe can we talk?" Yaz asked a bit sheepish

Doctor grabbed the console with both hands and pulled herself out of the hole "Always Yaz...is everything ok?"

"No, not really"

Doctor got up and wiped her hands into her trousers "What's wrong Yaz" she came up and wrapped her arms around her

"I don't know what's happening to me babe and it's scaring me"

"What's happening to you love. Tell me"

"I have this stupid fear all of sudden...of leaving Tardis" Yaz nervously played with her braces looking down at them "...and I feel so pathetic babe" she looked up into her eyes looking for answers her eyes filling with tears "What's happening to me?" As she said it tears rolled down her cheeks. She felt almost embarrassed saying it.

"Oh darling...c'mere" she pulled her in onto her chest and stroke her hair "It's ok beautiful It's not pathetic...not at all"

"I feel so stupid babe"

"It's not stupid and it's not pathetic. You're just still in shock Yaz, it's normal" Doctor cupped her face gently brushing her thumbs over her cheeks wiping her tears "Thank you for telling me this Yaz. I'm glad you did"

"But I don't understand. I've seen worse, been through worse as well"

"You have. And you've been absolutely amazing, and you still are... but you never had someone else inside you Yaz" she put her hands on sides of her stomach "Someone who's life is the most important to you now. Your priorities have changed...We will take risks when we are alone, but when someone else depends on us we will think twice Yaz before we do"

"I think you're right...all I could think about was the baby...she was the only thing in my mind...I was so scared of losing her babe"

"I know...that's all I can think about for months now Yaz...how to keep you two safe. And I'm so sorry I wasn't there I'm so sorry..."

"Noo...you're perfect" Yaz palmed her face "You're doing the best that you can, and this wasn't your fault, I never thought that for a second. And I'm sorry I don't listen to you half of the time" she smiled

"No, you don't ever...and it's annoying Yaz"

"I know I'm sorry...I promise I will from now on"

"Even when I say don't walk barefoot around" she asked suspiciously

"I promise" she laughed

"I'm gonna hold you to that one" Doctor kissed her palm

"I love you my beautiful Bighead...I don't know what I would ever do without you" Yaz gently tucked her hair behind her ears and wrapped her hand around her neck pulling in for a kiss

"Right" Doctor jumped taking he hand "Wanna see what's new on Tardis?"

"What's new on Tardis?" Yaz frowned "Please tell me you replaced the dishwasher"

"No... but I will get around to that as well" she said pulling her through the corridor

"You're saying this for months"

"I knoooow.... give me brake Yaz I had so much to repair"

"Alright" she rolled her eyes laughing "You're pulling me like crazy...my god where's the fire?"

Doctor opened the door of their room leaving Yaz confused "It's our room babe...what am I missing?"

Doctor smiled nodding her head pointing towards the bathroom on the right side of the bed.

"That door wasn't there this morning?" Yaz looked at her confused

"Nope" she nodded smiling "Wanna look?"

Yaz walked up to the door and grabbed the handle then turned towards the Doctor "You didn't?"

"I don't know what you're talking about Yaz" she smiled

"You did...didn't you?"

"Oh, just open the damn thing will ya" she jumped excited

 

Yaz opened the door and was speechless entering the room. There were stars on the ceiling and planets spinning around that looked so real as if there was a window into space above her head, an armchair in the corner and beautifully crafted wooden furniture. A small wardrobe, a changing table and shelves of toys that Yaz had never seen before in her life. The room replicated the library in many ways, Yaz's favorite place. It even had a small shelf on the wall with children's books.

"I still need to put a cradle inside and I was debating on a style because of the cradle" she scrunched her face "I know it's not a same style now, but I know you love the library and it's relaxing for you so...I can always change it if you don't like it"

"OMG stooop" she turned around smiling "It's bloody perfect...I love it" she squished her face between her palms "Everything is perfect...everything about you is perfect...I can't" she starts crying again "I'm a fuckin mess...I love you" Yaz pressed her lips on hers

"Alright then" Doctor said into her lips making her laugh "I'll move the cradle today if you want...or it can stay next to bed for now"

"Leave it for now...I like to look at it"

"Alright..." she jumps of the floor exited "Hey look at the toys Yaz" she started showing her all different gadgets making her laugh


Yaz was lying in a bed waiting for her to come and peaking at her through the open bathroom door as she wiped herself with a towel making her laugh how she would put it on a side of the sink completely ignoring it falling to the floor. She walked around the bed towards the chest of drawers.

"Don't" Yaz said turning around in a bed

"Don't what Yaz?"

"Don't put anything on...just come here" she reached her hand

"Mmmm...you want to see me naked Yasmin" Doctor smiled at the request and crawled into bed on her hands and knees over the duvet making Yaz giggle.

"Yeah" she laughed ruffling her hair as she hovered over her

"And why is that Yaz?"

"Take a wild guess" she giggled like crazy

Doctor shuffled around the bed and pulled the duvet from her "Aaaaa...and why are you in your pajamas then?"

"Cause I was hoping you'd take them off"

"Really" she raised an eyebrow pulling her bottoms down and frowning them across the room then making space for herself kneeling between her legs pulling her top off as well slinging it to the other end of the room as well.

"Very beautiful" Doctor said looking between her legs

"Stop that you silly sod" Yaz laughed covering her face with her hands and trying to put her legs together

"I'm only telling the truth Yaz" she hovered above her blowing air into her hands "Hey...do I get a kiss or you're gonna hide your face from me the whole night?"

Yaz opened her palms giggling "You're a nutter you know that?" she tucked her hair behind her ears and kissed her "Come just lie next to me...I want a cuddle first"

Doctor slumped on a bed and Yaz wrapped herself around her "Tell me something"

"Something" she laughed

"You're in your element today, aren't you?"

"Maybe...Well I can't be miserable all the time Yaz"

"Oh, shut up, you're not miserable"

"I have been a bit Yaz I am aware of it you know. I had a lot on my mind. Well, I always have a lot on my mind...but more than usual"

"You've been fine babe considering everything. To be hones it's surprising we're both normal considering everything we've been through since we met"

"We're not normal Yaz...who told you that"

Yaz burst out laughing "You do have a point there" she said trailing her finger over her shoulder "But I wouldn't have it any other way"

"Which part Yaz because I can assure you there are parts I would gladly erase or at least change if I could"

"I'm talking about good parts...We had some really good parts and those I would never change and if bad parts are a part of it all then all take the whole lot because I got you out of it all. And that's the best part"

"No darling neither would I... But I do wish I could have given you more of those good parts" she said trailing her finger over Yaz's open palm then lacing their fingers together "I do have a feeling sometimes like all I have given you is pain. Adventure yes, but also pain"

"No, you haven't. Pain is a part of life and I had it before I met you...it's unavoidable. But what you have given me is myself and found myself within you babe and that's worth all the pain that came with it"

"I really love you Yaz...so much" she brushed her finger over her nose smiling

"You can kiss me now" Yaz giggled

"I'm planning to" she laughed

                                                                                                                 ...

​

Tardis landed in Sheffield and Yaz rushed to the door. She could already hear voices outside arguing over the amount of luggage.

"Hey you...stop arguing" Yaz laughed opening the door

"Sweetheart" Nadjia turned around exited

"Hi mum"

"Look at you" she came over kissing her cheek

"I know big, ha? Come on in mum"

"Hi darling" Nadjia came up to the Doctor and hugged her

"Aaaaaaa....so nice to see you again"

"How are you doing?"

"Not bad at all"

"I missed you" Yaz hugged Sonya

"I missed you too"

 

"Ryan haven't seen you on a while" Yaz laughed

"Hello pumpkin" her dad hugged her tight "You look beautiful"

"Thanks dad"

"Hakim!" Doctor zoomed around the console and

"Doctor so nice to see you again. I'm so excited"

"I know me to...wait until you see all the plans its fantastic...Right fam... are we ready?" Doctor asked already having her hand on the lever

"Ready" Yaz said

"Zwari here we come" she smiled and pulled the lever