Come Monday morning Alex was on a way to a very special place she wanted to share with Yaz.
She was rather secretive about it, so Yaz was exited as to where she was taking her.

"So where exactly are you taking me?" Yaz asked looking out of the car trying to figure it out

"It's a surprise Yaz...it's something very important to me"

"Give me something.... anything"

"Noooo" Alex laughed

"Give me first letter then"

"Aaaaahhh...T" Alex smiled

"T?" Yaz frowned "You're taking me for a tea?"

"Noooooo"

"Train station? Taxy, turtle, training, tennis, turkey, tree, taco.... treasure...is this a treasure hunt?. This has to do with those Ginies and One eyed Billy"

Alex burst out laughing. She was absolutely screaming in a car trying to keep her eyes on a road "Goonies you silly sod and it's a One eyed Willy"

"That sounds like a dick...you do realize that?"

"Haaa whaaaa....Yaaaaaz I'm gonna have a car crash" she laughed like crazy

"It's true...one eyed Willy Alex...sounds dirty as fuck"

"Maybe in your dirty brain....like hoooow did you ever...."

"Willy...one eyed...come ooon...Use your imagination Alex you had one" Yaz laughed

"Yeah I did and I can assure you it did not have eyes" Alex laughed

"Was it big?"

"Was what big Yaz?"

"Your dick?"

"Yaaaaaz!!!!!....OMFG...." Alex's eyes grew wide as saucers "What the hell Yaz"

"Oh come oooon...I'm your wife...I wanna know" she grinned leaning over to Alex

"You're fucking crazy you know that...Whyyyy would wanna know"

"Cause it's you...I wanna know everything about you...besides that's my ex baby making machine that is now me love tunnel"

"Aaaaaaa....shut it...." she covered Yaz's mouth  with her hand and laughed so much that she was seriously thinking about pulling over until she calms down

"Was it like this?" She pointed with her fingers

"Duuuuuno Yaz....average...I can't fucking believe I'm saying this...and how did we come from T to my dick?"

"One eyed Willy" Yaz laughed "Oh come oooon...see made you laugh"

"You're crazy...You did this on purpose?" Alex poked her with a finger making her tickle

"Did a bit...I love you Alex....all parts of you...even if you still had one I seriously wouldn't give a fuck...I just want us to normalize your past...at least between us two and be able to laugh and talk about everything"

Alex gulped and went silent for a moment then reached for her hand kissing her knuckles "How did I ever find you?" She smiled

"You bought me a Coke" she laughed

"Best thing I ever did in my life" she glanced at her smiling "Here we are" she turned into a parking of local pub

"Pub?"

"Yeah"

"That's P"

"I know...." Alex laughed

"Cheeky"

"I did not lie" she said smug getting out of the car and reached for Yaz's hand as soon as she was close to her

They walked through to the courtyard at the back and Alex stood for a moment as if she was looking for someone then smiled a biggest smile tugging on Yaz's hand towards one of the tables.
An elderly woman got up as she saw them and Alex went straight to her letting go of Yaz's hand

"Aleeeex....my god" the woman opened her arms

"God I'm gonna crush you" Alex held her tight then pulled apart with a massive smile

"Look at you" the woman said lovingly "You're stunning"

"Awww...I've missed you so much" Alex said  holding her hands

"I've missed you too....I haven't seen you...gosh...what is it now?"

"Ten years" Alex said

"My god so it is"

"Since you left"

"Yes...since I left...You look so happy"

"I am....I'm crazy happy....Oh. Sorry" Alex got flustered "Soo sorry Yaz...I'm just overwhelmed....This is my wife Yaz" she said proudly

"Whaaaat? Nooo way!!!.... Aleeex!!!" the women was left speechless

"Yazee darling meet Angie...my therapist"

"T... that’s the T?" Yaz jumped "Sorry...she wouldn't tell me where we're going....Nice to meet you Angie" Yaz reached out with her hand

"Oh my goodness....waaaw....so so nice to meet you Yaz"

"Told ya I wasn't lying" Alex winked to Yaz as they al sat down

"You got married.....waaaw"

"Yeeeah...this Saturday actually"

"Really....omg congratulations"

"Thank youuuu" Yaz said

"Pleaseeee tell me everything...I wanna know" Angie said

"Well I'm working as OBGYN...I moved to Sheffield...actually not so long ago...Then I met Yazee cause her sister had a baby in my hospital"

"Waaaw..."

"Sorry Yaz...quick update. Angie was my therapist...she's the one who put my brain back together. Remember when I was telling you about the time when I started to transition..."

"Yeah I remember"

"Well, then Angie moved to US ten years ago and we haven't seen each other since"

"Texted...emailed" Angie said "But she's the worst for emails...and in all fairness time difference is huge and we sort of drifted away"

"So Angie sent me email last week she's back to UK and I just had to see her"

"Yeah I thought now when I'm retired I wanna be back home" she said

"So you're staying?" Alex asked exited

"Yap...my house needs some work I've been renting it since I left but as soon it's done that's it....I might do some volunteering...can't keep still....I am so happy for you Alex..." she reached for her hand across the table "See...remember when you asked me why do I even bother with fucked up people like you...."

"Oh god...I was so gross"

"You were in pain....This is why...seeing you now like this...happy being yourself...that's why...this is everything"

"I get that now" Alex pouted her lips "But I was a nightmare at the time" Alex giggled

"Small nightmare" Angie giggled

"Were you?" Yaz asked intrigued

"Oh Yaz told you.... you wouldn't recognize me"

"She was so shy when she first came to me. Took me ages to get her to talk..."

"And when I finally did, I was so gobby" Alex laughed

"Neah...I loved to see that spark...Your family...mum? How are they"

"Still here all of them, Annie has a new bloke....we like this one for a change"

"Eddie?"

"Neah...still alone...I beat him to it" she laughed "Now he's the old spinsters"

Angie laughed "And the others...any kids?"

"Oh yeah plenty, Jamie has a son 3, and daughter Jessica she's 12...remember, Ollie has little Ella 4 and Olivia 5 and Annie has a daughter Ruby she's 7"

"You're next....still want kids?"

"Always" she smiled

"And you Yaz? Tell me about yourself.... I’m sorry I'm nosy"

"That's fine...I'm a digital designer, my family lives close to the hospital where Alex works. I have a sister she just had a baby"

"How long have you two been together?"

"Since July" Yaz laughed

"Woooow....that's fast...so who snatched who here?"

"Alex...she was super-fast" Yaz laughed

"I thought I better before she changed her mind"

"That's so nice...God I'm so happy for you Alex. And your work.... you’ve done so well"

"I love my job and the hospital where I work is really nice...So how come you decided to go back?"

"I was only there for my work....this is where my heart is. And I do miss my family, I've missed too much of their lives already"

"Is your sister still here?"

"Yes, but she's in a warden control now since last year. Her condition got worse, also one of the reasons why I decided to come back"

"Angie’s sister has MS Yazee"

"Oh, I'm so sorry, what's MS darling?"

"Multiple sclerosis Yazee"

"OMG I'm so sorry"

"My sister has been suffering from it since she was 12. She got a lot worse now so warden control was the best option and it's just 10 minutes away from my house so I will be able to spend a lot of time with her"

"That's fantastic..." Alex said

....

They came home early noon, Alex was putting last suitcase in a car. She shut the boot and ran back into the house.

"Muuum"

"Hey baby....here...take this in case you’re hungry later" she said passing her a pot with food wrapped up in a bag "One o'clock lunch tomorrow....don't be late"

"I'm gonna miss you" Alex pouted

"No you won't...who are you kidding" she laughed "You're gonna forget all about me as soon as she kisses you"

"Stop thaaaat...." she blushed

"C'mere you big baby" she closed her arms around her "If you need anything call your brothers but you should be fine"

"We will mum it's still hot I don't think we even need the heating...as long as we have hot water and electricity we're fine"

"Last bag baby" Yaz said bringing a small travel bag

"Give it here Yazee" Alex took the bag and just popped it on back seat

"Right...guess we're done" Yaz smiled and opened her arms to Charlie "I'll miss ya"

"You as well" she laughed "What's with you two...First you sneak out and now when you have a key you're sobbing like babies....Go have fun smooching"

"We will" Yaz laughed

....

Alex turned to the familiar road, the little house looked different during the day. Beautiful Lobelia flowers and some other lilac and yellow ones grew on each side of the gravel driveway. Next to the door a hanging cast iron basket with Fuchsias.
They got the bags into the hallway and Alex walked into the kitchen checking the lights

"It works" she turned exited "Right...let's get ourselves settled"

"This is so cute" Yaz said looking around

"It is isn't it...I love this house....I used to dream about living in it" she said grabbing the suitcase climbing the stairs to a familiar room

.....

Music was loud from downstairs. Alex was unpacking them whilst Yaz was heating up the food her mother gave them and adding some fresh salad and potatoes to it. She was chopping tomatoes and looked through the window into the front garden. It was a first time she was in a kitchen looking over the countryside and it seemed so surreal and peaceful.

Alex leaned at the door, her hands in pockets of her trousers just soaking in a moment as sun shined over Yaz's shoulder across the kitchen counter and a bowl of fresh fruit on a table. Her hair draping over her shoulders and her back, shining that mesmerizing indigo color that always left Alex breathless, the smooth curve of her shoulder peeking through the locks of her hair. Her eyes followed the curves of her hips and Alex wanted to press her lips to them. She pushed herself off the door frame and stepped behind her wrapping herself around her. Yaz smiled leaning back as Alex reached for the knife and left it on the counter

"You're distracting" she giggled turning in her arms palming her waist 

Alex flashed her a smile wrapping her fingers around her neck and slowly leaning in lightly pecking her lips before pulling her in deepening the kiss sliding hands down her sides and lifting her onto the counter. The salad bowl tipped into the sink, but Yaz couldn't care less moving her arms up to Alex's neck and wrapping her legs around her kissing her with a passionate whimper. She smelled of lilies and May rose mixed with sweet smell of starch she used for ironing her shirts and her lips were hot and soft on Yaz's kissing her deep and passionate.

"I'm not hungry" Alex said into her lips

"I am for you" she chuckled twirling strands of Alex's hair through her fingers and ran her fingertips down the back of her neck then pulled her into another kiss

"Mmmmmm" Alex suddenly started pulling away when she herd the noise coming from outside "Ollie" she mumbled into Yaz's lips and took a glimpse  of her brother over her shoulder as he was approaching the house with his bike

"Whaaaat? Yaz jumped

"I forgot...I...it slipped my mind"

"Fucking hell Alex" she quickly rolled her top down and Alex pulled her down form the counter

"Your shirt...fuck"

"When did that happen?" Alex looked down as her shirt was flying open and her bra on a full display

They both tried fumbling with buttons for a moment "Fuck that.... go...put a t-shirt on" Yaz said smacking her bum

"Right....I'm so stupid I forgot"

Yaz rolled her eyes laughing making sure her hair is in place quickly dumping tomatoes back in the bowl hoping she didn't sit on one during their escapades. Thankfully Ollie took time to park his bike and got distracted looking at the broken fence next to the flower beds.

"Hey!....Hi" she smiled as he came inside

"Hi honey"

She wiped her hands in a towel and came over to hug him

"Is Alex here?"

"Yeah upstairs unpacking...I'll go get her"

"I'm sure she heard a bike" he giggled "I came to check your heating. There's a storm coming and a few days of rain. You'll probably need them"

"Thanks for that. It does look like summer  is over"

"You were lucky with few odd hot days...I think it's pretty much rain from now on"

"Yeah we were...Drink?"

"Sure...thanks"

"I have some of Alex's bear?" she said opening the fridge

"That's fine, we drink the same....Soo how do you like the place?" he asked sitting at the table

"Adore it...I'm a sucker for any house...Grew up in the apartment" she put the bottle in front of him "Aaaammmm...opener?" she turned around confused

"It's here see..." he smiled reaching for the small drawer of the kitchen table

"Waaw...didn't know it had a drawer"

Alex sat on top of the stairs for a moment letting them talk since her brother pulled her up on hiding Yaz from them. She found it amusing ear dropping on their conversation for a moment.

"So...yeah" Yaz continued "Absolutely love it here...it's so cute...and all the nature...I almost don't wanna go back" she sat opposite the table from him

"So I heard you're a hard core Whovian?"

"Ooooh yeah" she nodded "Alex got me Tardis cake for my birthday"

"Annie said you've got impressive collection"

"I wouldn't say impressive but I'm working on it"

"That's cool...I used to collect Daleks"

"Really?" She turned exited "No waaaay...."

"Yeah I was Davros for one comic on....I have to show you photos...I made the whole casing"

"Nooooo get out!....You made it?"

"Yeah the whole lot...I worked on it three months"

"Do you have it?"

"Neah...dad threw it away...said it was cluttering the garage"

"Oh noo sorry about that..."

"There's a comic on in Manchester this autumn....wanna go together?"

"Really? "

"Yeah...come on I haven't been in ages"

"You got yourself a deal...."

"Might make a Dalek again"

"Yeeeeees....yesss...do it...oh please...be Davros that's so fucking cool"

"Hiya " Alex ran down the stairs and straight to her brother kissing his cheek

"Hey hun...So...made yourself at home?"

"Getting there"

"Will you eat with us?" Yaz asked

"I will if you offer"

"Well, I'm offering" she smiled

"Let's get it done then" Alex said opening the fridge and pulled out one bear for herself

"I'll call you when it's done" Yaz said "Just waiting for potatoes"

"Alright sweet pea" Alex kissed her shortly then zoomed outside with her brother

.....

Yaz observed Alex mending Ollie's bike through the kitchen window. She was unaware of her talent, nor had she ever seen her in this element before. Although they were married, she learned how much of Alex remained unexplored, but she also enjoyed that aspect of their relationship. She adored her family and how they formed such a tight, unbroken circle, and it made her recognize how valuable it is to have it. It made her reconsider what kind of sister she is and made her ponder some of her own past when she wasn't too kind to her sister. Something she definitely wanted to change.
Unlike her, Alex was very much aware of the fragility of life and how the past could not be changed. She learned to appreciate the little things life had to offer, never wasting a single minute of her day, something Yaz felt she was jet to learn herself.

"Pass me the screwdriver" Alex said lying on the ground

"I missed this" Ollie said as he gave it to her

"Me too" she smiled squinting her eyes from the sun looking up at him "You really neglected it and I'm only gone few months"

"Wanna go for a ride after lunch?"

"Aaaarrhhh...Yazee's gonna kill me...."

"Oh come oooon just down to the church and back"

"Oh alright....Ok...it’s done..." she said getting up "And pleaseeee...oil...it can't run on air Ollie, you're gonna fuck up the engine then not even I will be able to help you"

She got up and wiped her hands in a cloth then sat down on a small bench near the door and took a sip of her bear

"What's it like in Sheffield?"

"Now beautiful...hated it in a beginning, I felt like I had to go rather than wanting to go. It wasn't easy..."

"Then you met Yazeee" he flapped his lashes messing her around

"Yeeeees..." she smiled silly "but when I came ...I was so lonely...It was kind of lonely I wouldn't wish on anyone"

"I'll never get over that you had to fucking leave to have a normal life" he said sitting next to her "But I'm glad you're finally happy" he draped his arm over her shoulder and kissed her temple

They sat there silent for a short moment, enjoying in each other’s presence

"Sometimes I wish he'd just died" Ollie said looking into distance "It's a terrifying though"

"I'm not sure what I wish" she rested her head against his "...Sometimes...I still find myself looking over my shoulder you know...or I think I hear his voice and then I realize it just happens to be a random bloke behind me "

Ollie ran his fingers over her shoulder comfortingly

"...But I can't help it...I get chills at that moment and feel a cold sweat"

"Do you get trouble? In Sheffield"

"Nooo.." she nodded "I think I pass enough now...Even though in my head sometimes I get paranoid that I don't" she smiled "Or people are just kinder...not sure which one"

"You passed a long time ago Alex...You were just the last one to see it cause the fuckers kept telling you that you don't..."

"Mmmm...Sometimes I still think I see that five o'clock shadow"

"Where? On a floor?" he laughed and kissed the side if her head

She giggled nudging him 

"Have you told her?...Why you really left"

She fell silent "Nooo..."

"Will you ever?"

"Yes...eventually...But its been enough about  me...she needs me now...she's got a lot of healing to do herself..." she pursed her lips "Very fragile my Yazee" she looked at her brother with a gentle smile "...Even though she probably seems like she's not..."

"You got each other’s back" he shook her by the shoulder smiling "That's the most important thing. Like mum said...you two are the best thing that happened to each other"

"We areeee..." she smiled back "You have to all come over when we sort out the house"

"You bet we will...What's with that? Did you buy it?" he got up and went to look at the broken fence "I need to change a nail in this" he said randomly picking the old wood with his finger

"No...not yet, first I have to sell the flat... Hang on, I'll get the tools" she said getting up "...I got an offer" she said as she disappeared behind the garage door looking for some nails and a hammer "....Now we'll see...hope it goes quickly" she continued as she came back and handed him the pliers then grabbed the wooden board holding it sturdy so he can get the rusty old nails out of it "I wish we could move in time for Christmas... I'm so chuffed"

"Mum says you postponed Africa this year?"

"Yes...I'll go in spring...I just wanna have this time. I waited so long for this I just couldn't get myself going. I can't be alone again...I don't think I could deal with it...Also...with moving, wedding...too much going on"

"Can't she go with you?"

"Did cross my mind" she scrunched her face “...Dunno" she shrugged "..Not sure she's too thrilled with the idea to be honest and I don't want to push it on her" 

 

"Food's done!!!" Yaz yelled through the window. 

 

"Coming baby" Alex shouted "Just give us minute we're fixing the fence." 

 

"Let's eat first then I'll check the heaters..." 

 

"Alright" 

 

.... 

 

 

"You didn't tell me you know how to fix cars" Yaz said as they sat at the table. 

 

"Not fix Yazee...not really...I do know basic stuff though...Changing tires, belts, oil...little stuff...But not much I can do on electrics now with new cars." 

 

"Waaaw....how did you learn all that?" 

 

"Mmmm...my dad trying to make a proper man out of me" 

 

"Oh god...sorry...We can change the subject" she said placing salad in the middle 

 

"It's alright Yazee...He used to drag me to the shop teaching me, wanting me to be a mechanic cause its gonna make a man out me" she rolled her eyes "...toughened me up. But when he came out of a slammer I refused to go down there when something was wrong with one of our cars" 

 

"None of us wanted to go there" Ollie said “...and next car shop is miles away." 

 

"So, his mate taught me at least basic stuff..." 

 

"How much stuff did you learn...Jesus...and when did you have time for all of that" 

 

"She's a book worm..." Ollie laughed "None of us had patience..." 

 

"More like no will" she laughed. 

 

"True..." Ollie laughed "...won't deny any of it.... When you just mention something to Alex, she's never gonna let it go until she learns it...It becomes an obsession." 

 

"It's not that difficult.... like anatomy" 

 

"If you say so" he laughed. 

 

"What do you do Ollie?" 

 

"Sales...Pretty boring..." 

 

"He works for Jamie's company...they sell software programs...They're doing really well." 

 

"Waaaw cool" 

 

"We did pretty well consider how fucked up our family was" Ollie said 

 

"I think that's why we did well to be honest..." Alex said 

 

"You come from a big family Yaz?" Ollie asked 

 

"Yeah...Well, my dad does...and they are completely dysfunctional as well. Alex knows...My mum and dad decided to keep to themselves a long time ago...they do bare minimum things like birthdays, weddings, and funerals.... And me being into women didn't help...ripped the family apart even more. Now they're on Sonya's case for having Prem and not getting married...I feel so sorry for her." 

 

"Sorry about that..." 

 

"I'm just glad my parents are normal...I'm very lucky in that" 

 

"Well, some people shouldn't have kids...like our dad..." Alex said 

 

"Some people should rot in jail for the rest of their life...like our dad" Ollie added. 

 

"Her parents are lovely..." Alex said "And her sister." 

 

"I was gonna say that...I spoke with your dad a lot at the wedding. Really nice guy...and your grandma is fun. She kept cracking jokes the whole evening, Katie and I pissed ourselves...she's got a spark in her for her age" 

 

"She can be when she gets into it" Yaz chuckled "I was afraid it's gonna be a bit too much for her bless her.... but she lasted the whole evening...really enjoyed herself." 

 

"I can't believe her and mum did Karaoke" Alex laughed 

 

"I knoooow...." Yaz laughed "That was epic" 

 

After checking the heaters and doing a few minor repairs, Alex and Ollie went for a drive. Yaz relaxed on the sofa scrolling through her phone. When Alex returned, she found her asleep, her phone still playing some movie she was watching, her curls falling off the edge of the sofa, the strap of her t-shirt hanging off her shoulder. Alex smiled and carefully moved the phone. She drew the curtains so the late afternoon sun wouldn't wake her and covered her legs with a light blanket. They were both still exhausted as they hadn't slept much since the wedding and the day had been long as they had been up since seven in the morning. 

 

Her clothes were covered in dust, and she was convinced that she didn't smell too good either so she rushed upstairs to take a shower while Yaz slept. It was also an opportunity to check how the boiler works. 

 

Yaz was still asleep, so she sat in the garden. As the day drew to a close, more and more clouds gathered in the sky. The weather was definitely changing, and evenings were getting cooler, she pulled down the sleeves of her light thread sweater, her fingers peeking from underneath the hem holding a book as she relaxed on her grandmother's large wooden garden chair that her granddad had made. It was the first thing Alex pulled out of the garage when they arrived. 

 

"Morning" Yaz giggled 

 

"Hey! ..." smiled turning around "Had a nice nap?" 

 

"Why didn't you wake me up?" she said, giving her a quick kiss, leaning over the edge of the armchair and pulling a blanket over her shoulders then settled in her lap. 

 

"Cause you look too cute when you sleep" she giggled tapping her nose 

 

Yaz tilted the book checking what she was reading. It was some random fiction she bought the other day from the store. Alex would literally eat books unlike Yaz. She would go through one each week then donate them once she’s finished with them "How long have you been out here? 

 

"About an hour" 

 

"Did you have a nice time?" 

 

"Yeaaaah" she smiled silly "You should go once Yazee" Alex said leaving a book on a small table 

 

"No chance" she giggled twirling Alex's index finger playfully 

 

"Why nooot?" 

 

"Cause I'm not adrenaline junkie like you are" she laughed 

 

"It's fun" she giggled rubbing her face into Yaz's arm 

 

"Car racing, motorcycles..." 

 

"It's a small town Yazee, we were board" she laughed 

 

"But that was sexy to watch" 

 

"Ha?" she looked up confused 

 

"You, fiddling with that bike...The view from the kitchen window was a serve" 

 

"OMG" Alex burst out laughing. 

 

"I think I'm gonna do something to my car just to see that again" 

 

Alex couldn't stop laughing, her face turned red as a strawberry as she chuckled into her shoulder 

 

"I'm serous...that was something...I almost put sugar in a salad...I mean my knickers were wet already thanks to you" 

 

"I can't.... You’re crazy" she was choking by this point 

 

"Uuuu...I think I just felt rain" Yaz said 

 

"It will definitely rain tonight" Alex looked up at the sky. It was dark by this point as days got much shorter and there were no stars in the sky. 

Summer was definitely over, and evenings smelled more and more of autumn. 

 

"Mmmmm...." Yaz tucked her face into Alex's neck "Would you be an absolute star and do something?" 

 

"What?" 

 

"I fancy some of those niiiiice pancakes you make...I bought chocolate spread" 

 

"Alright" she said kissing her temple 

 

"Yes!!.. We can snuggle up...Watch something on my computer" 

 

"You got yourself a date" 

 

 

.... 

 

 

Yaz put the last plate in a cupboard and smiled as Alex's arms wrapped themselves around her palming her stomach. 

 

"Mmmm..." she hummed palming her hands 

 

"I think we're done" she said resting her head on her shoulder "Forgot to tell you we're invited for a field trip on Wednesday...If you're up for it.... everyone’s going" 

 

"Really? Sure, why not" 

 

"Good cause I already said yes" she giggled into her shoulder" 

 

"Well lucky for you then" she laughed "...where are we going?" 

 

"It's an hour drive to the lakes then we walk from there...stop off, have some food...It's gonna be fun" 

 

"Sounds like fun" Yaz said and leaned herself on Alex chest completely, humming barely audible as her hands got more daring across her stomach. She slowly started moving with determination and Yaz got the memo. It didn't take much for Alex to make her toes curl, in fact it was embarrassing how little it did take for her whole body to turn into jelly in her arms. Those arms which now sneaked underneath her top cupping her breast whilst her lips trailed a line across the slope of her neck. 

 

"Fuck...Huh" Yaz moaned quietly and tangled her fingers in Alex's hair then brushed her palm over her face pulling her into a kiss as Alex's back suddenly smashed into the counter. When did that happen? She didn't know or care how they even got there, she only knew both their brains were a fuzzy mess at this point reduced to pure want and need. 

Alex hasn't planned this, she certainly never imagined it and wasn't even sure what came over her, yet there she was, in the middle of her grandmother's kitchen stripping her wife down to bare skin, palming every inch of her, kissing her breathlessly as if her brain short circuit in a blurred mess of passion and desperate desire with her hand shamelessly wedged between her thighs. 

 

"Mmmm" Yaz mumbled almost pathetically into her lips as one of Alex's fingers was teasing the line down the hem of her underwear as every muscle in her body twitched in response and she was sinking in her arms "Pleaseeee" she moaned breathless and took Alex's bottom lip between her teeth whilst she was squirming in utter desperation to feel her inside. 

Alex obliged, sinking into her soft and smooth as their lips parted in a sigh of relief. Her head sunk on Alex's shoulder and her hips started slow rolling motion chasing a high as she took Alex's lips into hers deep and passionate. Their movements slowed down becoming more intense, less desperate now as they were both sinking into every moment. 

Yaz's fingertips brushed ever so lightly over Alex's arm sending shivers down her spine, she tucked her face into her cheek, her breath hot and deep on her skin moaning quietly as her body relaxed into a slow rocking motion losing herself in her arms feeling like she was falling. 

She sunk in Alex's arms as she touched parts of her that she knew made her toes curl and legs shake, it was the most incredible feeling to have her surrendered, supple, and in need of her touch so much that she trembled in her arms. Her hand clasped over Alex's holding it firmly pressed to her breast as her chest was rising underneath her palm. Her legs quivered against the side of Alex's hand, and she felt them losing their grip as she sloped shaking in her arms. 

Yaz leaned on her breathless closing her eyes and wrapped her arms around herself. They both fell silent for a moment it was calmness after frenzy. Their hands lightly brushing over each other and Alex's lips dotted gentle kisses to her blushed cheek. 

 

"Dirty Alex" she chuckled and looked up at her dazed pulling her into a lazy kiss 

 

Alex giggled "Don't know what came over me" she laughed and ran her palm down her neck "I just missed you so much" she said gently rocking her side to side 

 

Yaz ran her hand lazy down the side of Alex's leg "I just need to get myself to bedroom and I'll show you just how much I miss you" she said and turned around snuggling her face into her neck then chuckled as a light breeze from the open kitchen window brushed over her bare ass and Alex was now pulling her top down trying to cover her 

 

"Trying to cover up the evidence?" she laughed "Shameless dirty Alex" she mumbled kissing her neck 

 

"It was shameless, wasn't it? I'll be thinking about this next time someone's gonna chop tomatoes here" 

 

"OMFG" Yaz laughed palming her face "Kitchen porn" she laughed 

Alex covered her face with her hand laughing her head off. 

 

"Come on charmer...let's go to bedroom" she laughed grabbing Alex's shoulder and pulling tangled trousers and knickers off her ankles then tugged her hand towards the stairs 

 

Alex chuckled watching her tapping up the stairs in front of her naked from the waist down and leaned over kissing her bum cheek 

 

"Aaaaa...Dirty fucker" Yaz laughed and ran upstairs 

 

.... 

 

The soft light of the candles by the window lit the room, their smell mixed with rose purpurea and fabric conditioner from freshly washed sheets filled the room. Small drops of rain pattered on the copper benches outside, and thunder could be heard from afar. But the room was warm and cozy, and they lay in silence enjoying a long needed cuddle. Alex watched the raindrops slide down the windows, the slow motion of Yaz's fingertips circling playfully along her spine and over all her curves soothing and lulling her to sleep.

Yaz watched as the candles cast shadows across each of her vertebrae and flickered across the curve of her lower back, her skin still cooling, still slightly damp from the thin layer of sweat pooling in the hollow of her lower back, leaving a salty taste on her lips as she trailed her lips over it, each kiss followed by barely audible moans of content from Alex's mouth. She placed her head, resting it on Alex's shoulder blade, passing her palm over her hips. 

 

"We might sell the apartment next week" Alex said breaking the silence 

 

"Really?" Yaz lifted her head from her shoulder blade 

 

"Mmmm..." she turned her head towards her and puffed hair from her face too lazy to move her arms tucked underneath the pillow "I accepted the offer...So unless they change their minds" 

 

"OMG" 

 

"I'm so chuffed about having a house Yazee...Can't wait to get settled" 

 

"Well, at least we don't need to do a lot inside" Yaz said shifting across and lied next to her resting her head on her arm 

 

"Mmmmm....that's true..." she smiled softly moving on her side "It's existing..." she said as her eyes soaked in a beautiful shimmer of Yaz's skin bathed in a candlelight and trailed her fingers from her shoulder down the length of her sides "You excited?" she smiled changing her focus to Yaz's eyes 

 

"Yeeees...also seems scary...I never had mortgage.... I was never that much of an adult" she giggled 

 

Alex giggled and moved her curls from her shoulder "Any idiot can buy a house Yazee...means nothing.... it’s just money..." she tugged on her wrist, her silent way of demanding more physical closeness. Yaz moved across the bed and Alex wrapped herself around her pulling a duvet over them both "It's having a home that matters" she said kissing her softly "Not everyone can do that" 

 

"You're already my home" Yaz said wrapping her arms around her 

 

"And you're mine sweet pea, the rest is just bricks" 

 

"God I've missed this" she hummed snuggling into Alex's cheek wrapping her arms around her 

 

"We've been seriously deprived" Alex chuckled "I thought I'm gonna implode....Proper snuggle" 

 

"Mmmmmm..." 

 

Alex traised her finger gently over her cheek. Her eyes gazing at each little detail of her face "I love you so much Yazee" she whispered 

 

"I love you too gorgeous" she said tucking her face into her neck "I'm so tiered" 

 

"Sleep baby..." she said wrapping her fingers at the back of her head squeezing her lightly against herself 

 

 

.... 

 

 

They left the house first thing in the morning deciding to go downtown and get breakfast and their first morning coffee before shopping for food for Charlie. It was still fresh after last night's rain with small puddles still visible by the side of the road. They were sitting in their favorite little cafe as the sun suddenly came up Yaz took off her cardigan and sat back in her chair looking through the photos of Prem that her sister had sent her while she was waiting for Alex 

 

"Here Yazee...take it" she said balancing the tray worrying about spilling something 

 

"You got us brownies!" she said excited 

 

"Yap" she smiled 

 

"I'm going into my pms I need that" she said as she took the coffees off the tray 

 

"I knoooow" Alex's giggled and sat down "I'm gonna miss this now when it starts getting cold" she said relaxing in a chair closing her eyes enjoying the sun 

 

"I was thinking that..." 

 

"Buuut...Christmas is coming" she chirped haply taking her sandwich 

 

Yaz burst out laughing "Only you can think about Christmas in September" 

 

"It's gonna come really soon Yazee...you'll see" 

 

"You do realize how hard it's gonna be getting back into work mode after this?" 

 

"Oh god...And I'm into marathon of night shifts when I come back" she huffed disappointed. 

 

"Oh god yes...." 

 

"I knoooow...that's the only part of my job I really hate" 

 

"That's the only part of your job that I hate" Yaz said pouting her lips "I fucking hate sleeping alone...I'm already dreading it" 

 

 

..... 

 

 

They walked slowly to the car and continued talking. It was parked a few minutes away in a small car park next to the local train station. It was a nice walk in the sun. 

 

"Oh...by the way Sonya got her money...." Yaz said then realized she wasn't present, suddenly getting distracted by something straining her eyes "Alex?" she looked at her frowning "What's wrong?" 

 

"What the hell?" she said and started running towards the car 

 

"Aleeeex...what the fuck?" She looked confused then saw Alex examining the lights on the car and pissing out kicking the tire with her foot 

 

"OMFG!" all words have died on her lips when she approached closer. The front lights completely mangled and a massive crack across the window "What the hell" 

 

"Fuck..." Alex kicked the tier one more time and slumped her back to door with a sigh closing her eyes 

 

Yaz ran her fingers over the cracked window, wanting to say something but breaking out in a cold sweat when she looked up to see an all too familiar man approaching Alex. 

 

"Aleeeex" Yaz said slowly walking around the car 

 

Alex opened her eyes and became completely stiff. Her legs were weakening, and her blood was draining from her face.

The man had a swagger about him, smoking a cigarette and smiled proudly as he examined the damage on a car. 

 

 

"Told you to go boy..." he puffed smoke from his mouth and pointed at her with a cigarette in his hand. "But you don't listen do ya?...Always stubborn like your mother. You think you're so smart? Think you're better.... special...When all you are is just sick fuck" he yelled getting into her face and Alex twitched closing her eyes and moving her face sideways 

 

Yaz carefully withdrew the keys from her back pocket and placed them between her fingers. She gazed at Alex as she clung to the car, his face so near to hers that the smells of booze and cigarettes in his breath assaulted her face. 

There was no one nearby. Just a small, half-empty parking lot surrounded by trees and a train station that appears to have been rarely used. 

 

Alex gulped deeply, was silent, and appeared as if she would climb the car if she could out of sheer terror.

 

 

"You just have to push me to the limit, don't you? Every tiiiime!" he yelled again into her face then pulled back a bit "I warned you what's gonna happen...didn't I?" 

 

"Just pleaseeee..." Alex cried out, but the words became stuck in her throat when he seized her jaw with his hand. 

 

"Shut that gob boy or I'm gonna shut it for you!! You shut the fuck up!" he shoved her against the car so hard Alex whimpered and pressed his cigarette on a side of her arm stabbing it into her skin while she cried out in agony "You're just sick fuck in a skirt and a wig" he spat into Alex's face as her tears rolled down "Crying like a pussy...look at yourself...You're making me feel sick" 

 

Yaz blinked completely frozen, her brain fighting furiously to grasp everything and blood raced through her cheeks. She went blank as she looked like Alex's tears were flowing down her cheeks and her hand gripping the side of the car. 

She didn't think, she couldn't think, she didn't have time to think, she just launched at him, hitting him sideways with all the might she had, and he flew away, losing his grip for a split second. She noticed blood streaming from his arm, right below his shoulder, where the keys had cut deep line into his skin. 

Alex went limb against the car, she was shaking, her head was pounding. 

 

"You fucking bitch...." he stared at his arm "I'll fucking kill you" he rose up gripping his balance and headed for Yaz as she stiffened from dread taking a step back. 

 

What happened next flashed before her eyes as Alex moved in front of her, seizing his wrist in mid-air and knocking him to the ground. Yaz stood transfixed. She had no idea how or when this happened, but she watched Alex as she booted the man who had tumbled on the parking lot gravel, his hands covering his face. 

 

""LEAVE ME ALOOOONE!" Alex shouted, kicking him with her boots anywhere she could, blood dripping from his nose as he desperately tried to cover his face with his hands. "FUCKING CUNT!....YOU SICK FUCK!....LEAVE ME ALONE," she shouted, continuing to kick him. 

 

"Aleeeex!" Yaz finally came out of it "OMFG Aleeeex enough!...You're gonna kill him," she said grabbing her waist, but Alex yanked her hands away and continued beating him. 

 

"Do you like it?" How does it make you feel? Ha? "Am I man enough now?....AM I?" she yelled, her voice breaking. "AM I TOUGH ENOUGH NOW, YOU SICK FUCK?" 

 

The man curled into a ball on the floor, and Alex continued to unload on him her whole life misery, kicking his ribs, arms, and back wherever she could. Yaz attempted but couldn't get her off him. 

 

"FUCKING PSYCHO!" she shouted as tears streamed down her cheeks, then sank her back to the car, exhausted, her chest heaving and her hands shaking. Her shoulders fell as she sobbed hysterically. 

 

""Aleeeex" Yaz said faintly. Alex glanced up trembling, her eyes lost utterly, floating aimlessly into nothing "Let's go home," she said quietly touching her face gently, pulling hair away from her face, and Alex clutched both of her wrists with quivering hands "Let's go home, baby." Yaz repeated 

 

"Pleaseeee" Alex cried out 

 

Yaz opened the car door and Alex sat in the passenger seat. She looked down at her shaking hands coated in dust and blood, she had his hair stuck between her fingers and wiped them hysterically on her jeans. Yaz shut the door and looked to the man who was still lying on the ground. He wasn't moving, and she was breaking out in cold sweat. She took a phone from her back pocket and dialed while walking around the car. 

 

"Jamie...We have problem..." 

 

"Yaz you alright?" a panicky voice from the other side asked 

 

"Noo...Alex kicked the shit out of her dad I think he needs an ambulance" 

 

"Come again?" 

 

"Pleaseeee parking lot by the train station...he's not moving Jamie I'm freaking out here" 

 

"Fuck...shit ...alright... stay there I'm coming" 

 

"I can't stay here, Alex is no state...I'll park at the entrance...Please call ambulance" 

 

"Alright...no worries...I'll call Ollie he's closest to you...Just stay there honey we're coming" 

 

.... 

 

An ambulance came, and so did the police. Also, Jamie's lawyer and all of Alex's family. Both Alex and Yaz had to give statements. As far as Yaz understood from the stress, the case is clear, and Alex will not get into trouble. As for her father, he will likely face jail time again, for physical and verbal assault and property damage, as well as violating a restraining order against Alex and some other complicated legal stuff that Yaz had trouble keeping track of. But at that moment she didn't care as she sat on the cold chair of the hospital waiting room. Alex was given sedatives, the doctors said she was having a nervous breakdown and needed to rest before they could let her go home. She rested her head on Charlie's shoulder as she gently caressed Yaz's hand with her fingertips. 

 

"Sigma?" the nurse came out 

 

"Yes!...." Yaz jumped to her feet followed by Alex's whole family 

 

"You can see her now, but one by one. She can go home in about an hour. But she will need a lot of rest and no stress" 

 

Yaz took a deep breath 

 

"Go on...go" Charlie said 

 

"You're her mum?" 

 

"And you're her wife..." Charlie placed her palm on her face "Go honey" 

 

Yaz carefully opened the door and entered. Alex lay on a bed, looking at the window, hooked up to a drip next to her, her arm covered in a bandage.

As Yaz closed the door she turned her head and held out her arm, 

 

 

"Heeeey" Yaz rushed across the room, took her hand, kissed her knuckles, and leaned over to stroke her brow. Alex cried softly and reached for Yaz's neck, bringing her in for a desperate kiss as tears streamed down the side of her eyes and soaked into the pillow. 

 

"Shhhhh...It's alright baby," she said quietly, wiping tears from her cheek, "...It's alright...shhhh," she sprinkled small kisses on her forehead, "I fucking love you sooooo much." 

 

"Yaaaaaz" she cried out, covering her face with her hand 

 

"It's gonna be alright baby...You're never gonna see him again...It's over Alex" 

 

"Pleaseeee cuddle me," she whispered, her chest rising in a long sigh. 

 

Yaz climbed the bed and lay next to her, wrapping her arms around her. Alex cried quietly hiding her face into her neck, her fingers clenched around Yaz's arm. 

 

....