"You did what?" Nadjia shouted over the phone 

 

"I'm fine" 

 

"What the fuck is wrong with you?" 

 

"I'm fine mum, nothing happened" 

 

"Nothing except having your head cracked open. He could've slashed you to pieces" 

 

"That's what I said" Theta added 

 

"Oh, here we go...But he didn't mum" 

 

"Well thank fuck for that. Honestly, you're gonna be the death of me." 

 

"We sent you postcard" 

 

"Don't change the subject." 

 

"I'm nooot" she laughed "Love ya" 

 

"Piss off" 

 

"Thanks mum" 

 

"You're welcome. Don't forget to take your tablets" 

 

"I thought you wanted me to piss off" 

 

"Stop being smart with me. I have to go my train is here. And please for god sake, try staying out of fucking trouble" 

 

"Yes ma'am" she chuckled as she hung up and lied down exhaling "Traitor" she laughed tugging on Thetas hand pulling her on top of herself. 

 

"I like your mum" she giggled dropping kisses over her face 

 

"You should like me" Yaz chuckled smacking her bum 

 

"I do like you...but I like your mum as well...you should drink your tablet" she sat up and leaned over to the side table getting the pill and the glass of water then pushed it into Yaz's mouth "You should rest. It's really swollen." 

 

"I knoooow. Stay with me" she asked running her hands down Thetas sides 

 

"I'll be your nurse" she leaned over kissing her 

 

"Mmmm...I should do this more often" she grabbed her hips pulling her closer 

 

"Dirty mind" Theta chuckled 

 

 

.... 

 

 

"You need a sunscreen" Theta forcefully smeared a cream on Yaz's back 

 

"I fucking hate being all greasy like a bloody chip" 

 

"It's not greasy" 

 

"It is, fucking gross" 

 

"Oh, stop throwing a wobbly...There" she slapped her bum and closed the cream 

 

"Can we go now?" She impatiently grabbed the rucksack from the bed 

 

"Yes, now we can" 

 

The beach was only ten minutes walk from their room but in a scorching hot sun it seemed like an hour and they were both relieved when they finally got there. Yaz stood for a short moment taking it all in then helped Theta to lay down the towels. 

 

"Wanna go in?" Theta reached out her hand 

 

"Definitely" she smiled and took her hand 

 

"Waaaw, the water is so warm" Yaz said surprised as they walked in up to their waist 

 

"Told ya. Not like England." 

 

"This is paradise babe!!" Yaz yelled as she threw herself in making Theta laugh 

 

"See, much better than a stinking pool" 

 

"Point taken" 

 

After a short swim they sat underneath the parasol having some sandwiches. Music could be heard from the beach Caffè and Yaz had an idea. 

 

"Wanna have one of those ice coffees?" 

 

"Yeaaaah I do actually" 

 

Whilst Yaz was getting them a cool drink Theta quickly texted her parents then took few more photos. She was struggling with a broken phone, so she dug through the bag for Yaz's. 

 

"More photos?" Yaz laughed when she came back 

 

"Of course...My phone is fucked" 

 

"Here you go babe. Look at that" she passed her a big plastic cup filled with ice coffee, topped with whipped cream and chocolate sprinkles 

 

"Aaaaaa...that looks amazing. Thank you" 

 

"God, I could easily live here" Yaz sighed sitting back on the towel "You know what...I never thought I'd see anything like this" 

 

"You're gonna see much more baby" Theta brushed her fingers across hers on the towel "Loads more." 

 

"I hope so..." she fell silent for a moment enjoying the view "I was gonna tell you...I've been thinking about something" 

 

"What baby?" 

 

"I thought of moving to CID. Jack is moving, he asked me if I wanna go with him." 

 

"What's CID?" 

 

"Criminal Investigation Department" 

 

"Whaaa? What like a crime unit? Like a detective?" 

 

"Yeah" 

 

"You wanna be a detective?" 

 

"Yeah...I do actually..." 

 

"Whyyy? I thought..." 

 

"I feel stuck here. I can do so much more. I'm capable of more than just domestic disputes. It'll take time, I'd have to go through training but..." 

 

Theta sighed and put her drink down 

 

"You don't seem thrilled?" 

 

"It's not that. I want you to succeed...I really do...And you are capable of more it's just that...I dunno. That freaks me out a bit Yaz." 

 

"Why?" 

 

"You're gonna deal with hard core criminals babe. That's a whole new level. I'm just really worried about you...something happening to you" 

 

Yaz reached for her hand and kissed her knuckles "Theta darling, it's not like in the movies you know. That's not what it looks like in real life." 

 

"I don’t know what it looks like in real life, do I" 

 

"I'm not gonna be chased by a mass murder or anything." She laughed "It's not like that...Actually it's a bit more desk work and less streets." 

 

"Is it?" 

 

"Yes, it is babe." 

 

"Promise...you're not just saying this to make me feel better?" 

 

"I'm noooot.... promise" she leaned over planting a kiss to her forehead "Look, how about we meet up with Frank? You can ask him whatever you want." 

 

"Is that what he does?" 

 

"Yes"

 

"Alright..." 

 

"Come on...I need a swim" she tugged on her hand 

 

..... 

 

Chapter continues after the artwork

Back in their room Yaz was going through the brochure looking for some entertainment whiles Theta was taking a shower. She came across a fun little restaurant with live music and thought it would be a good idea to try getting a table so she stepped out of the room for a moment to make a call, not being too hopeful she would get one at such a short notice. But as it happens, they did have one, so she returned to the room pleased with her little surprise plan for this evening. 

 

"Where did you go?" Theta walked out of the bathroom wrapping a towel around herself 

 

"Getting cigarettes" 

 

"Didn't know they sell them here" 

 

"They don't ..." she laughed 

 

"We'll get them in the town, don’t worry...I was thinking..." she said then paused picking a dress out of the wardrobe hanging it on the door 

 

"Thinking about what?" Yaz came up behind her wrapping her arms around her kissing her neck 

 

"If you do that, we won't leave this room" she giggled closing the wardrobe and palmed her hands on her stomach 

 

"Maybe we should stay then" she mumbled into her skin with a smirk palming her stomach "What were you thinking?" She whispered in her ear giving her shivers 

 

"I forgot now" she breathed out as a hand slipped between the folds of the towel trailing down her stomach and the other hand wrapped around her neck as her girlfriend's lips trailed over her earlobe and down her jawline turning her legs to jelly. Her half-open eyes caught their reflection in the mirror, and Yaz's eyes locked with hers. 

 

"You're so beautiful…" she whispered in her ear and then her hand reached out to Thetas leading it to the wardrobe frame lacing their fingers together 

 

"What are you doing?" she smiled 

 

"Watch" the words vibrated in her ear as a hand slipped down her stomach and fingers ran through her wiping the smile off her face and she sighed deeply. 

 

"Yaz I…" the words trailed off as the other woman pressed her lips to her neck. She grabbed Yaz's wrist pressing against her, looking at her own blushing cheeks and eyes desperate to stay focused as her palm slid over the mirror that was now steamed with her own breath. She watched the hand cup her breast as the towel slid down her body neglected on the floor and her hips as they slotted Yaz's perfectly. Fingers tracing her whole body and down her stomach and an arm wrapping around her holding her in place as the other woman curled her fingers deep inside her. Theta rested her forehead against the mirror, the surface cool against her skin, feeling her own breathing as her hot breath evaporated on it, Yaz's lips trailing down her shoulder. 

 

"Kiss me," she sighed, searching for her eyes in the reflection, and the other woman obeyed, turning her around. Hitting her back against the cold mirror, she winced. Her eyes wandered over Yaz's face for a moment, then pulled her into a hungry kiss. She moaned wrapping her leg around her side and relaxed as she felt her inside again, resting her head against hers and wrapped fingers around the nape of Yaz's neck. Her hot breath brushed against Yaz's lips as she huffed breathlessly ignoring the creaking of the wardrobe under their combined weight. The silky fabric of her girlfriend's cargo trousers tingled her inner thighs, she hooked her fingers threw the belt hoop pulling her closer, then found her lips again and took them in hers kissing her deeper and more passionately tangling her fingers in her braid as she rocked her hips against her taking her as deep as she possibly could. Then she fell silent, her head falling on Yaz's shoulder and lips lazily kissing her skin. Her legs shaking, barely holding her. 

 

"I think we broke the wardrobe" she giggled trying to catch her breath and looked up at her girlfriend 

 

"Might have done" Yaz chuckled kissing her forehead

 

“Bed” she chuckled pulling Yaz`s top over her head  

 

They laid in silence under the deemed lights of their room dragging the moment before they would have to get up for dinner. Theta spooned behind Yaz running lazy lines down her arm and back up again. Her skin still hot against hers and body still trembling. 

 

"Why so quiet love?" 

 

She smiled and looked at her over the shoulder "Just enjoying in this" 

 

"I thought something's bothering you?" 

 

"Not really..." she said settling down on the pillow again 

 

"Sure?" 

 

"Maybe…just a little" 

 

"What baby? Talk to me" 

 

She went silent for a short moment ".... It’s just... Dunno ....This holiday made me think...you know... about our future and how I want our lives to look like" 

 

"And what do you want our lives to look like?" She smiled planting a small kiss to her shoulder 

 

She turned around and wrapped herself around Theta bringing her closer, then fell silent as her eyes floated across her face. She moved a little strand of hair from her girlfriend's forehead getting lost in her hazel eyes. 

 

"Tell me" Theta pushed for answer palming her cheek as it was apparent something was sitting heavily on her soul 

 

"I want to do better...I want us to be happy" 

 

"But we are happy.... right? You are happy with me?" 

 

"I am... Course I am... I’m happiest I've ever been."

 

"But?" 

 

"I want us to be able to this...You knoooow...Go places and not worry, do stuff...." 

 

"You're talking about money?" 

 

Yaz inhaled deeply, her eyes filling with tears "Yeees...Well...not just that...It's just that I can't stop feeling that..." she went silent again

 

"What baby?"

 

She didn't answer, instead tears rolled down her face and her chin wobbled 

 

"Oh Yaaaaz .... Baby...Not everything is in money" 

 

"It is when you don't have it" 

 

"This is really bothering you, isn't it?" 

 

"Mmmm...It's not just that...I want more" 

 

"I feel like whatever I say I'm not gonna change your mind. But I already told you and I was as honest as I can possibly be...I don't care about money, I really don't. I want you to succeed in your job and I want you to feel proud of yourself...I really do...But only that. I want it because of how it makes you feel about yourself. But I don't give a shit if what you do makes a minimum wage." 

 

"But I do" 

 

"And I will support you 1000% if that's what makes you happy. But I don't want you ever to feel lesser..." She wrapped her fingers around the side of her neck "...Or feel pressured that you have to because of some idea of a life you want for us in the future that involves shit loads of money. That's not why I'm with you. This is nice...where we are. But I would be happy the same in Brighton as long as I'm with you" 

 

"I would too...I would...But I want to prove to myself that I can do more. I need that Theta...I need to know that I can do better than counsel flat and night shifts at the bar." 

 

"And you will..." she brushed her finger over her cheek "You will darling...You said that's why you decided to move to the other department." 

 

"It is...But you're scared, and I don't want..." 

 

"Whaaaa??" She lifted her head from the pillow "Yaaaz...is this about what I said on the beach?" 

 

She kept quiet 

 

"It is, isn't it? OMG...I never meant it that way.... Yaaaz...never mind how I feel...I shouldn't have said that. I realize that now." 

 

"It's ok I understand..." 

 

"No, it's not...Look...I... Shit why did I say that? ...Baby I come from a family where nobody did what you do. And yes, it makes me nervous I won't lie. But that's not a reason for you to give up on it.... Is that what this is all about?" 

 

"Yeah" 

 

"Baby noooo...I'll just have to have a word with myself. I'm slowly getting used to it...I am... And I will, but that's my problem not yours." 

 

"I don't wanna make you feel unsettled. You've been through a lot..." 

 

"You're noooot" she nodded "Ok? I promise...you're noot...I just have this stupid idea in my head of what your job looks like from I dunno...crime series...I just need you to talk to me and be honest with me and I need to know what's going on and how it really is. If I know I'll be fine" 

 

"Are you sure?" 

 

"Yeees" she palmed her cheek "Absolutely sure. Just promise me you will always tell me stuff. Pleaseeee, don't spare me or sugar coat stuff for me." 

 

"Alright...I promise" 

 

"So will you go for it?...Please say you will" 

 

"Yes" she smiled 

 

"You were really gonna give up on it for me?" 

 

"I was actually..." she chuckled relieved 

 

"Oh, you silly sod...I can't believe this...I would never ask you that. Ever...And you kept quiet about it all this time you silly woman. I'd always support you, no matter what you wanna do baby" 

 

"C'mere you" she pulled her closer brushing her lips over hers "I love you...so much" 

 

"I love you too...Feeling better?" 

 

"Yeees.. " 

 

"So, one day, in not so far future, do you believe you will be in charge?" 

 

"I hope so" 

 

"Not hope so..." she pulled away "You will...Say it" 

 

"I will" she giggled "Can I get a kiss now?" 

 

"Always" she smiled pulling her in 

 

.... 

 

It was their last evening before leaving early in the morning. Yaz packed her bag with a heavy heart and Theta couldn't miss the sudden mood change in her girlfriend as the evening approached. She walked up to her and took the t-shirt out of her hand, leaving it on top of the open suitcase then wrapped her arms around her waist planting a gentle kiss to the side of her neck. 

 

"There's gonna be other holidays you know" she smiled locking her eyes with hers 

 

"That obvious ha?" Yaz ran her finger down the side of her face tucking golden lock behind her ear 

 

"Yeees" she smiled softly "Don't be sad...This is just the beginning...You and I... We’re gonna see the whole world together" 

 

"Is that a promise?" 

 

"Absolutely... That passport of yours isn’t gonna have space for stamps anymore" she smiled leaning into Yaz's palm as her fingers cupped her face 

 

"It was beautiful" 

 

"It was perfect" she smiled and let herself be pulled into the kiss. 

 

.... 

 

Before dinner they went down to the beach to watch the sunset one last time. A cool breeze brushed Yaz's shoulders as her toes fell through the warm sand. She basked in the smell of the ocean air and the pink sky watching the small waves hit the shore rolling the sand and her girlfriend tapping barefoot through the water looking for small shells and special stones. Her gold hair and still pale skin bathed in the last rays of sunshine. She never felt happier in her life. 

 

"Look what I found" Theta ran up to her showing a beautiful blue glass pebble shaped by the sea. "Isn't it stunning?" She lifted it up towards the sun 

 

"You should make it into a pendant" Yaz smiled kissing her temple 

 

"OMG you're right...I should" 

 

"I can ask my dad's mate. He has a jewelry store." 

 

"Yes pleaseeee...I'd love that" she smiled haply 

 

"Deal...Come on snuggle bug...We're gonna be late for dinner...We should go" she draped her arm around her. 

 

..... 

 

After landing in the UK, they were both deflated by the weather. The clouds floating in the sky and barely 20 temperature reminded them both that the vacation had indeed come to an end. 

 

"Can't wait to see Lola" Theta said as they sat in the cab. 

 

"Me too...Now I can't wait to get home." 

 

"I'm knackered. It all feels different coming back." 

 

"Yeah, longer and not so exciting" she laughed 

 

"True...One more day and then back to work...yawn" 

 

"Did you have to say that?" 

 

"Sorry " she laughed 

 

.... 

 

The cab parked in front of Thetas parents house and her mother was already outside waiting for them. 

 

"Hiya" Theta waived as they both got out of the car 

 

"Hi" Yaz smiled 

 

"Look at you two beaming. Did you get engaged?" 

 

"Muuuum!" Theta laughed kissing her cheek 

 

"Just asking" 

 

"Where's my baby!!" Theta crouched down as Lola went nuts seeing them both 

 

"Hey, you...Had a nice time at nans?" Yaz went down to pet her then stood up to finally say hello to Thetas mum "Hey Ashley...thanks for taking care of her" 

 

"Always...Had a nice time?" 

 

"Ooooh god.... the best" 

 

"Aaahh that's brilliant...You look happy" 

 

"Very happy" 

 

"I'm glad.... The weather here has been awful." 

 

"Oh noo" 

 

"They say it's gonna be better next week...I don't believe them.... You should go and I shouldn't keep you, your cab is waiting. Come over for lunch tomorrow...Unless you have other plans? Going to your parents Yaz?" 

 

"Noo...My parents are away for the weekend. We could come" she said looking at Theta 

 

"Yeaaaah...why not...Alright mum...See you tomorrow. Thanks for Lola"  

 

..... 

 

They were finally home. Yaz rolled the suitcases into the hallway. The apartment seemed stuffy and hot, so Theta rushed to open all the windows. 

 

"Seems so strange...being back." Yaz said walking in 

 

"I knoooow...It always feels like that after I come back...Oh nooo...shit!" 

 

"What's wrong?" 

 

"Aaaarrrhhh fuck!" She moaned from the bedroom "The window leaked" 

 

"Whaa!..." 

 

"Look...all down the wall and the carpet...Fuck"

 

"Shit....how? Did we leave it open?" 

 

"Nooo....The fucking state of that wall...And the carpet..." 

 

"Don't worry about the wall...I can fix that." 

 

"Nooo Yaz" 

 

"Seriously...Don't worry about it...I'll call Malik, we can get that plastered and repainted...I'm more worried about the window" she leaned over to look from the outside "Dunno...Can't see anything" 

 

"No babe you're not doing that...They're new. I'm gonna call on Monday. They're still under warranty, I'm sorry but they will have to replace that" 

 

"Speaking like a true lawyer" Yaz laughed 

 

"Too right I am. They cost an arm and a leg. I'm not having that shit. And I'll see to get the money out for fixing the wall as well I'm not having you and your brother doing that." 

 

"I don't mind" she laughed kissing her temple 

 

"I do...You're not my skivvy" she pouted upset 

 

"Come on grumpy lawyer..." she rotated her towards the door pushing her out "Let's order some food I'm starving" 

 

"You're trying to distract me" 

 

"Yes, I am" she laughed tapping her bum as she walked out of the bedroom 

 

"It's not working" 

 

"Oh yes, it is" she laughed 

 

....