Chapter 29
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The morning sun was breaking through the closed curtains of the bedroom window. It was early, too early to get out of bed which was soft and warm. Yaz rolled over the bed and put her leg over Clara's side, her arm around her chest. Clara woke up just enough to intertwine their fingers and let out a sleepy moan. She was happy that she was still there because most mornings she would wake up to an empty bed, so she buried her face in her golden locks, breathing in her scent. She smiled at the mint and beeswax mixed with the scent of the Tardis from last night and it was the Tardis smell that reminded her of Christmas. It was only now she released that this was the smell she felt on Clara from the moment she met her. Yaz found it as intoxicating as she found everything about Clara intoxicating. She could feel her breathing through the thin fabric of her cotton pajama top and her heart pounding in her chest against the hand Clara was clutching tightly to her chest. In just two weeks, she will become her wife, life partner and her soul mate. A thought that made Yaz choke with happiness. And this day was getting closer and closer, she was getting more and more anxious. Anxious with happiness, not worry for the first time in her life. She was also marring an alien, a thought she sometimes pushed away because it was so outside the box.
It was still a mysterious part of Clara's life that Yaz was patient to give her as much time as she needed to share, and even if she never would because of all the pain associated with it Yaz was fine with that. It was this Clara who was lying next to her that was most important to her. The life they were building together meant everything to her. It was with that thought, she snuggled closer to her and buried her face deeper in her future wife's hair, falling asleep again.
She was woken up by a tickle of her nose and when she opened her eyes she saw Clara smiling running her fingertip down the length of it.
"Morning sleepy head" she smiled
"Morning baby" Yaz said with a yawn
"It's almost noon by the way" she laughed "I thought I wake you up for lunch" she giggled
"OMFG I'm so sorry"
"It's ok...You always were a sleepy head...Some things never change"
"I know, I'm a lazy person" she giggled and wrapped her arms around her "C'mere" she pulled her by the t-shirt "Lie on me...I wanna feel you"
Clara shuffled over the bed with a happy smile kicking off her boots and settling herself in her arms. She kissed the side of her neck and took a deep breath "I love the way you smell in the morning"
"What do I smell like in the morning?" She giggled enjoying in her weight pressing her into the mattress. It was always a welcome thing in her life.
"You smell like baby powder and you soooo soft and warm" she wiggled her bum between her legs and Yaz locked her in draping her healthy leg over her waist "Now you're making me lazy" she said laughing and kissed the tip of her nose then her cheek then her lips and moved down showering kisses over her chest "Whanna help me out?"
"Sure...in what?" Yaz asked stroking her hair
"Weelll...as it happens I need to sort out all those books we took to the library..."
"Yes...yes yes!!" Yaz jumped up super exited and Clara lifted her head up grinning
"I thought that's gonna make you happy...I'll show you around"
"Aaaaaaaaa! " she yelled excited "Really? Can I see the forest?"
"Yap...and the wardrobe" she kissed her chest "And we can take a swim" she grinned lifting her top kissing her breast
"You're joking?"
"Nope..." she said taking her breast into her lips giggling "Naked" she laughed
"Uuuu....speaking my language baby" she giggled pushing her lower down...
….
"Babeeeee....where do you keep the tea?" Yaz yelled from the Tardis kitchen
"Bottom drawer on your left" Doctor yelled from the hallway carrying another load of books from the house into the library "I hope they are ok...it's been a while Yaz"
"Yap...they seem fine...but you have something rotten in a fridge babe. This place really needs a deep clean"
"Oh, shoot...that's my root killer" she peaked from the door
"Ewwww...you keep that in a fridge?"
"Yeah...iff I don't it grows Yaz...meet me in the library"
"Sure" she said making a tea
It was absolutely the weirdest feeling for her being inside the Tardis and making a tea in the spaceship kitchen that looked like a regular kitchen in some apartment. Everything about it spoke to her about Clara and how she lived before they met. It was simple, almost humble. Cupboards completely empty just few packets of biscuits with expiration date on them long past. It all spoke to her of loneliness and sadness of her tiny future wife dwelling alone on a massive empty ship. There was handwritten note stuck to fridge door written in Clara's handwriting on a small piece of paper "We need some milk. Love ya, Thete xx"
Yaz ran her fingers over it and it made her heart sink. Apparently it was written to her beloved wife whom she had lost. And that made Yaz so emotional that she had to hold back tears. Thete... a name that echoed in her as if she had heard it before, she had never heard Clara say it, at least she didn't think she had. Or maybe it was a sweetheart name her wife called her. The way Clara keeps giving her silly names like butterfly. There was another note on the refrigerator door. A small drawing of Clara that Yaz recognized by the blue trousers and rainbow colored shirt. It had blue hearts all over the drawing and writing in Gallifreyan that Yaz didn't yet understand. Clara was teaching her, but it was difficult for her to learn all the rules of all the symbols, dots and lines. She felt like she was almost intruding into someone's life that didn't belong to her. The shadows from her girlfriends past that she was trampling on.
She took the tea cups in her hand and her church into the other heading twards the library slowly
"Hey baby" she yelled not seeing her "Where are you?"
"Hey lovely....I'm up here" Clara yelled from one of the balconies "I'll be right with you" she said leaning over the wooden railing
"Alright babe" Yaz smiled and walked over to the sofa. She placed the cups on the coffee table and stood next to it looking around the library
"Hey butterfly" Clara smiled walking up to her "Why don't you sit down"
"Ha?...what?" Yaz turned towards her with a lost gaze
"You alright Yaz? You look like you've seen a ghost?"
She shook her head and blinked "Yeah...I meant no..no I haven't seen the ghost...sorry"
"Yaz darling is everything alright?" Clara cupped her face "You look like you're gonna cry"
"I'm sorry"
"C'mere...sit down"
"Can we go home?"
"What?" Clara blinked confused "Yaz...speak to me...did you see something...is something scaring you?...talk to me"
"It's just...I feel like"
"Like what Yaz?"
She took a big breath with her eyes filled with tears that were about to roll down her cheeks "Like it's not my place to be here"
"What...whyyy?"
"It's...your wife and...it's your place...your home...I feel like I'm intruder"
"Stars Yaz" she pulled to her chest and ran her fingers through her hair. Tears filled her eyes and breath got caught up deep inside her throat. Yaz clenched to her so hard and cried silently into her chest
"I'm so sorry baby" she spoke quietly into her chest
Clara cupped her face between her palms and brushed her thumbs over her cheeks "Yaz darling it's alright baby" she kissed the tip of her nose "C'mere" she took her hand and sat her on a sofa holding her hands and running her thumbs over her knuckles "Yaz darling...this is really important what I'm gonna say...I'm over 3000 years old darling...that's a lot of years. This place...this ship" she looked up and around "It's filled with my past...all the places I've been to and all the people I've been...12 that I can remember...and all the people I loved and lost" she gulped and looked up holding back her tears "And there are soooo many Yaz that I have lost in all those years" she looked back into her eyes and wrapped her fingers around her face "And so many I have loved...but that's my past love. You're my present and my future" she ran her finger over her cheek "You're not intruder baby. You’re a part of my life...you're a part of it darling because this is a part of me...this here is all of me. So you belong here the same way you belong inside my hearts" she placed Yaz's hand on her chest. Her hearts were pounding fast and her chest rising as her voice began to shake more.
Yaz whimpered and floods of tears ran down her face "I'm sorry...I didn't look at it like that...it just...I felt so uncomfortable"
"Stars Yaz nooo please....never" she pulled her onto herself and wrapped her arms around her so tightly Yaz felt she was being crushed "Please don't feel that way Yaz because you feeling that way really hurts....Hey..hey" she pulled her back and smiled a little "I have a brilliant idea" she said and wiped Yaz's tears with her palms
"What?"
"Let's clean this place up...and tell me what you want...and we change it...whatever you like...purple sofa?...We can have a purple sofa I always wanted one...we can buy one...it's your favorite color" she smiled
"Alright...I'd like that" she smiled
"Brilliant ...Oh, please don't cry" she kept wiping the tears off her face with her palm "We go and buy crumpets and your favorite tea and we put it in a kitchen...and Ice-cream....I have a machine somewhere...I haven't used it at least 57 years"
"OMG" Yaz laughed "I think you might need a new one babe"
"Whatever you like...you make it yours so it feels like a home...I want this place to be your home as much as our house is"
"Ok" she smiled nodding as Clara still held onto her face so firmly between her palms "Kiss me baby" she said desperately
"C'mere butterfly" she pulled her in and kissed her gently then dotted her lips over her cheeks, her forehead and finished with the tip of her nose "I wanna show you something" she smiled into her lips "Whanna see?"
"Mmmm" she smiled nodding
….
They were walking down one of the many corridors and Yaz was getting lost where they were. She felt like she was following Clara like a white rabbit into Wonderland. Which was funny in itself because she was blonde and she hoped super hyper all the time, and she loved her tea and the thought made her laugh until the smile froze on her face as the door opened to another completely different world which created thoughts that she was seriously tripping on some strange drug. There was a whole forest, a huge deep real forest beyond the door and as they stepped inside she looked back and saw a door… it was set inside a mountain… a real mountain with a door on it and she blinked shaking her head trying to make sense of everything around her until Clara's hand pulled her away and she looked ahead again at the endless forest with real trees and birds and butterflies flying around.
"Is this fucking real?...Ups sorry" she frowned apologizing to the Tardis "I can't not swear this is insane...this is fucking insane!"
"I know right...pretty isn't it?...It's gone a bit wild since I left I should really sort it out"
"Whaaat? What do you mean sort it out? Is this a virtual reality program?"
Clara laughed "Noooo Yaz...goodness of course not...that's so outdated"
"Oh, yeah sorry, of course it is...my girl from the future" she laughed
"No darling just another planet...not the future" she turned around and smuged
Yaz rolled her eyes laughing holding her hand for dear life so she doesn't fall over the roots of the trees on a narrow pathway. Suddenly a massive bug flew in front of her face and she screamed
"What?" Clara turned around
"What the hell was that?"
"Oh, Anax magna Yaz"
"Whaaaa?" she frowned horrified
"Dragonfly from Orniux"
"Orni what?"
"Orniux darling, it's a planet in the fifth galaxy constellation of Fraxia...very nice place"
"That's fucking huge so I doubt that....I'm not really a lover of bugs" she said looking around horrified
"I know my cute butterfly" she laughed "You never were"
"Butterflies are nice...but I draw the line there....Clara where are we going?"
"Patients Yaz...I promise you will love it" she grinned haply "You alright walking here? We can go back if it's difficult?"
"Just hold my hand and I'll be fine...It's ok as long as none of those things fly around me"
"Blimey...I can barley find my way around this place I really need to sort this out" she said moving the massive ferns out of the way...Aaaaa there we are" she moved the big branch "C'mere darling...slowly...mind the branches" she said as they bent underneath the one of the tree branches
"OMFG!" Yaz's eyes open wide
"Like it?"
"Waaaaaw" she smiled looking at crystal blue lake with a white sand on the bottom
"Swim?" she grinned exited
"Oh yeah" Yaz said with a massive smile across her face "you need to help me though"
"Oh I can get out of your clothes Yaz before you blink"
"I know you can cheeky" she laughed
"Careful baby...just hold on to me" Clara said as they slowly entered the water. The sand under their feet was soft and slid between their toes, and the water was pleasant and warm. It was easier for Yaz they went deeper and then Clara held her waist walking backwards until she could get into the water
"This is so beautiful!" Yaz yelled like exited kid taking a dip
"Told ya" Clara giggled and splashed water over her
The lake was quite large, the size of an average swimming pool and as they swam further the water got deeper and deeper. Yaz looked down and saw all the way to the bottom because the water was crystal clear. But it was a good ten feet below her to the bottom, or so it seemed to her
"Clara"
"Yes baby?"
"There are no...you know animals here?"
"Oh, there's this fish...it's quite nasty but I'm sure we'll be fine they don't come out during a day"
"Whaaa?" she looked at her in pure horror and turned to see how far away was the beach
"Got ya!" she laughed
"Fuck off Clara" she splashed water over her face
"C'mere silly" she pulled her by the hand and Yaz wrapped herself around her. She learned Clara was a strong swimwear as well, holding them both floating like this "Like it?" Clara asked exited.
"Love it...still feel like I'm tripping though" she giggled
"I assure you you're not tripping Yaz" she smiled
"This is your word" she said looking around holding herself for her shoulders.
"Yap" she was looking at her so obviously reading every reaction on her face. Every little twitch and she waited impatiently for Yaz's response.
"It's stunning...absolutely stunning"
"This is...but not everything is Yaz"
β
She looked again at her eyes which were shining on what appeared to be the sun, but Yaz wasn't sure what it was because they were obviously inside a spaceship, which absolutely blew her away so she just told herself it was the sun and continued to concentrate at Clara's beautiful autumn eyes that looked greener in the light.
"I know it's not baby" she tucked her hair behind her ears "But you said this is all you...and it's as beautiful as you" she said and kissed her softly "You're struggling keeping us floating...let's go"
"Noo.. stay" she wrapped her arm around her waist pressing them closer together and stilled in the water keeping them floating resting her forehead on hers "I love you Yasmin...I love you so so much"
"Why do you always say that with such desperation as if I will disappear into the air?" she said kissing her cheek
"Because I'm afraid that you will"
"But I won't...not ever...not as long I'm alive....and I absolutely, completely, utterly adore you too" she said into her lips and kissed her slowly
They swam back to where their feet could touch the bottom and stayed there for a while. Yaz wrapped herself around her listening her stories about the forest and all the places inside the Tardis Clara wanted to show her.
"It feels so wired when I step back into garden from here" she said tucking her face into her neck. The warm water of the lake made her leg feel better and she felt no pain, so she was in no rush to come out even though her lips were slowly going blue and her fingertips were already wrinkled. Clara's was tracing her hand down her spine lazily and feeling weightless in the water wrapped around her in her arms in this beautiful place wasn't helping. She felt like she could stay like thus for hours.
"You get used to it with time. You'll see...I don't notice it anymore"
"You never wanna go back to this do you?"
"At the moment no...I love our home Yaz...i love the life we have...I wanna keep it for as long as I can" she spoke quietly brushing her fingertips down Yaz's lower back "But if I ever do...You know, feel like it...I want you with me" She kissed Yaz's cheek gently then rubbed her nose into her cheek attentively.
"I would go to the end of the universe with you"
"Good" she grinned "Because universe Yaz has no end" she wrapped her arms around her tightly and dunk them into the water laughing
That evening, Yaz was still in awe of everything she saw and kept asking Clara a bunch of questions. She learned a lot about how the Tardis works and how Clara can add and remove rooms and all about its basic functions. It was a strange feeling to listen to all that. Now more than ever before it struck her that Clara was not really human. All this time she kind of pushed that to the back of her mind and just simply saw her as a silly, eccentric little woman who was a physics teacher and that image of her kind of matched her strange manner and her silly language. But it suddenly dawned on her that Clara really wasn't human and that they had a time ship parked in the corner of their garden that was a whole other world inside. It suddenly became inescapably clear how this little, tiny silly person was sustaining this whole strange world inside a tiny blue box and how she was over 3000 years old. It blew her mind so much that she had trouble sleeping that night. She tossed and turned in the bed until Clara wrapped herself around her like a koala and mumbled into her neck as always. She was finally lulled to sleep by the rhythm of her two hearts beating against her chest, lulling her to sleep.
…
The two weeks until the wedding seemed to be approaching so quickly and Clara was getting nervous. In a good way, where her hearts would beat faster every time, she thought about it. They traveled to Oxford a week before to be at the hotel for all the preparations. She was overwhelmed with the paperwork they had to do before and was getting everything ready for Monday morning. A favor she had to ask from Kate because the papers really should have been submitted months before. But everything with them was fast and chaotic from start to finish and this was no exception. It also seemed strange that Yaz would now take her name. The woman she knew all these years as Yasmin Khan will now be called Yasmin Sigma. The name the Doctor had long forgotten, the one she hadn't used in centuries, would now be written on all of Yaz's documents. It was a strange thought. It also did occur to her that she never told Yaz her dead name, not to this Yaz anyway. The one that only a few knew, and no one ever used apart from her...her one other...the one she doesn't want to think about. Clara was just a mask, a kind of a game. But it grew so much on Yaz that it has now become a part of the Doctor. Just as strong a part as her long lost beloved friend was. And there was also a strange poetry in it. She always wanted her to move on and finally find her happiness, to love and be loved and not to dwell in anger and sadness. And she seemed to honor that promise in some way.
"Yaz darling" Clara called from the study
"Yes baby"
"Come here for a moment"
Yaz walked into the study and Clara pulled her hand sitting her in her lap as she always did.
"What baby?"
"Well, I'm doing the paperwork for the wedding I need you to be sighed it. It also just crossed my brains something"
"Something is always crossing your brains" Yaz giggled kissing side of her head
"Mmmm...true...I'm so silly Yaz I never told you what my name is"
"You have that silly Doctor thing and Sigma" she giggled "Doctor Sigma" she giggled like crazy
Clara laughed sinking her head into her shoulder "You silly sod...Nooo...not really darling. It's a name I chose for myself when I changed my life and left Gallifrey"
"How many names do you have girl?" she laughed "Ok...do tell..." she wiggled in her lap exited
"Theta...Theta Sigma is what they used to called me when I was at the academy"
"OMG...that name...Thete"
"Ha?" she frowned confused
"The name from the note on a fridge...the one in a Tardis kitchen"
"Oh...you saw that..." she said nuzzling her nose over her face
"Yeah I have...sorry"
"Sorry for what Yaz...don't be silly" she kissed her cheek
"I love your name...it's beautiful"
"Neah.." she scrunched her face "I haven't used that name properly in centuries...at least 2500 years"
"Fuck babe...are sure you can remember it?" she laughed like crazy
"You cheeky bugger...course I can...I remember everything I'll have you know"
"So no dementia?" she laughed
"What is this? Take a piss out of me day" she laughed "No...not for now...though you never know with those old brains Yaz...they may need rebooting from time to time"
"Well as long as you don't reboot your body any time soon"
"Not planning to" she laughed
"Good then, cause I really like it"
"I know you do...don't want wrinkly old git do ya?"
"I'd still love my wrinkly old git you know" she squeezed her arms around her
"Oh, Yaz...you say that now...that's not easy you know" she said running hand over her sides tucking her face into her neck
"I'm not saying that it is...just saying I'd still love you the same...and we'd work through it" she said and kissed the side of her head "Not sure how I'd explain that to my family though...I think mum might lose it, nanny be right chuffed cause you're a bloke"
Clara giggled into her shoulder "You're proper crazy Yaz"
"Just saying...it wouldn't be all bad"
Clara looked up smiling "You know what I'm gonna say?"
"That you love me so so much...and you're gonna say it in a way that makes my nickers wet"
Clara laughed like crazy shaking her head "What have done to you"
"Ruined me for the rest of my life babe" she giggled and fell silent as Clara slowly pressed her lips to her kissing her so deeply and passionately that her heart leapt out of her mouth. Which she didn't think was even humanly possible after all those months and so many kisses between them. But she would still tremble at her touch and feel as if the whole world were collapsing around her when she held her in her arms. She never wanted to lose those feelings and hoped they would stay for the rest of her life. Clara broke the kiss with a soft smile and tapped her nose with her finger
"Let's get this done so we can relax"
"Alright...where do I sign?"
"Right there butterfly" she pointed to the paper and kissed her temple
"I'll have to get used to signing myself as Sigma"
"Well maybe I should've been Khan then?" she laughed
"No...told you I want this. she said quite seriously as she signed her name. Thinking that this is very likely the last time in her life that she signs as Khan.
"I know lovely.... right... that's done then. Tomorrow we meet up with Kate and her mate and get this all sorted....Exited about Oxford?"
"I can't wait...I wish we could take Tardis"
"Whaaa?"
"Yeah...I mean...I feel a bad leaving her alone now I know she feels everything"
"She's gonna be fine Yaz"
"So we're getting purple sofa after the wedding?"
"Definitely" she squeezed her tight
"I need to lie down"
"Hurts?"
"Not as much anymore. Just walking around without the crutches puts a lot of pressure on it...But I'm really trying...
"Don't you go overboard Yaz...that leg needs to heal properly"
"I know Boo I'm just so fed up being like this"
"Booo Yaz?" Clara raised her eyebrow then Yaz burst out laughing
"Oh come ooon...You call me butterfly"
"Boo" she starts tickling her "I'm the Doctor I have you know...Not Boooo!!!"
"Uuu...I'm shaking so scared the big all mighty Doctor" she laughed like crazy "Aaaaa stop that...I'll piss all over you" she screamed wiggling
"Oh grait piss on me as well...that's gonna go down well in history" she continued tickling her
"Boooo" Yaz yelled again laughing and regretted it the same second "Aaaaa....nooo...stoooop...I surrender!.. I surrender!" she started slumping down her lap to the floor
Clara laughed like crazy "Stars Yaz..." she grabbed her forearm to stop her from falling
Yaz got up laughing "Pleeease nooo more"
"I'm not touching you" Clara pissed herself laughing "See...hands" she starts getting up slowly grinning
"Don't you dare!!!! I can't run!" she pointed a finger at her going backwards "Doctooor nooo!!" she yelled and Clara stopped dead in her tracks, she blinked shocked but Yaz continued laughing grabbing her wrists to stop her from tickling her father
"Alright, alright I'll stop..." she said and hugged her tightly looking up at the ceiling containing her tears pressing her against herself
"Promise"
"Promise ..stopping..." she said feeling her hearts jumping inside her chest "I'll just be Boo if you want" she laughed as a small tear run down her face "Sounds like Casper"
Yaz laughed into her shoulder
Later that evening, Yaz fell asleep on the sofa while Clara prepared dinner. She came in and crouched next to her, moving her hair out of her face. Yaz was hot to the touch like she was burning with a fever and that worried her. Knowing now what was going on in her body, it was not a good sign. She was worried that her regeneration energy would be out of balance, and she would have no way to help her. There was nothing visible from the outside, no typical orange haze, nothing to ever indicate what was going on inside. But Clara knew it was there, lurking hidden behind her biology, half-sleepy swirling inside her and slowly reshaping, reformatting every cell in her body into something, something that was still a mystery to Clara. She knew the best thing to do would be to take her to Gallifrey, something that was out of the question at the moment and was her last resort.
"Yaz baby, wake up darling" she brushed her knuckles over her cheek
"Mmmmwha?" she mumbled
"Wake up darling" she ran her thumb between her eyebrows gently stroking her forehead "Dinner's done...you need to eat"
"Alright...my head really hurts" she rolled on her back "Can you dim the lights please?"
"Sure" Clara pursed her lips and got up switching off the main light and leaving only the small table lamp on in a corner of the room by the window. She drew the curtains closed and came back to her side
"I think I'm coming down with something" she said as she sat up "I'm so cold"
"You feel hot Yaz...I think you have a fever darling. I think you caught a cold from being in that lake for so long" she said wrapping a blanket over her "I'll bring your pajamas from upstairs and you have some food. I have a nice pumpkin soup you like" she said crouching in front of her wrapping fingers around her face
"Yeah that sounds nice" she smiled
"Then I'm gonna pop to the Tardis get something for your fever"
"No more jabs pleaseeee"
"No jabs...just a big tablet and it tastes like sweets you're gonna love it.
"I hope so"
"You will...I have them sometimes when I fancy something sweet"
"You have tablet?"
"Can't harm me" she shrugged her shoulders
Yaz rolled her eyes laughing "I used to do that with cough syrup when I was a kid"
"Aaaa the pink one is nice"
"OMG yes..." she giggled "God my head...it feels like it will explode"
β
…
β
β
Early Monday morning they set out to meet Kate. As they sat in the car, they both felt excited and nervous at the same time. Everything was happening so fast for the two of them now and the day was coming faster and faster. On Friday they are going to Oxford for almost two weeks, and when they come back, they will be back as a married couple. Clara was seriously considering taking the Tardis rather than the car, and then just taking the rental car as soon as they arrived. Yaz's health scared her, and she felt much more comfortable having her Tardis with her. The words echoed in her head again, "You're nothing without your Tardis Doctor" it was a cruel joke and filled with so much truth in it, something she found hard to accept, but it was a fact. At least that way she knew that whatever happened she could get from point A to point B in less than a minute. She also had everything she needed and more in her beloved little blue box. There was a part of her that was also happy to have her there on the most special day of her life. Somehow it didn't seem right to leave her alone in the back garden, that thought didn't seem right in her hearts. It would mean Yaz would be flying for the first time since the night it all happened and that in itself felt so good in her hearts in so many ways. A feeling of some new beginning for both of them. She knew that Yaz was secretly hoping for it, her excitement was growing day by day and she could see her eyes widen every time she walked inside.
"Exited?" Clara turned around smiling as they were driving
"My heart is racing so much"
"Well you still have time to change your mind" she said smirking looking at the road
"Oi, you!" she smacked her knee
Clara giggled "Just saying Yaz" she turned around grinning
"So do you by the way..." Yaz pulled a smug face
"Neah ...Made up my mind the day I met you" she said turning the car around the corner
"Charmer"
They got out of the car and Clara reached out for her hand "Why did you ever leave that crutch at home Yaz"
"Because I'm getting better and I need to start walking proper...I've had it with this"
"Just worried about you that's all. It's quite a walk from the car you know"
"I'll be fine"
They walked inside the building where Kate was already waiting for them.
"Morning Doctor" she smiled "Morning Yaz, so nice seeing you again"
"Hi, nice to see you too" Yaz said smiling
"So sorry about your leg"
"All my fault" Clara said
"You were very lucky Doctor. We're still working on it. I had a call from Jack Harkness"
"Aaaa good, he promised he's gone call. Thanks for this by the way. I really appreciate it.
"Don’t mention it Doctor"
"I really had no idea getting married is so complicated on Earth. They make it very formal...not very romantic I must admit"
"I suppose paperwork never is" Kate smiled as they went up the stairs "But don't worry about it. David was a very good friend of my father's. He'll sort it all out for you in 24 hours"
"Brilliant."
….
"Well I suppose I’ll see you in less than a 2 weeks?" Doctor said as they walked back outside after submitting all the documentation
"I'm really looking forward to it Doctor. Yaz it was really nice seeing you again"
"You too Kate. I'm glad you're gonna be there. It means so much to Clara"
They were walking towards the car in silence then Clara suddenly turned around tugging her hand "Aaaaaa Ice-cream Yaz...I really fancy some Ice-cream"
"Yeah...me too now you mentioned" she giggled
"I still have time till my lecture. Come on"
"What was Kate saying darling? Was that regarding this case you're working on and people who broke into our house? "
"Yes...Jack said he's going to take over until the wedding is out of the way. And he's gonna work with Kate because I don't feel comfortable leaving him to do this by himself. This is big organization Yaz. He needs more people behind him"
"How did you even find out about them?" she asked as they sat down on a terrace of a cake shop. It was a nice sunny day and the place looked lovely
"It was a long time ago Yaz, 57 years ago"
"Whaaaaa?"
Clara laughed "I know...right...Anyway...There was a person who ran away from their research facility. He was a genetic engineer whose family was taken hostage. They forced him to do genetic experiments on live subjects. First animals then people...and not only humas Yaz. They kidnapped people, different races from many places"
"OMG...what were the tests...what were they doing?"
"At the time Yaz I didn't know. They killed him before he had a chance to tell me. But what he did tell me is where he worked. So, we went into the facility..."
"And? What? They escaped?"
"No... they haven't. The place where they worked from was a massive spaceship. We got into trouble Yaz...big trouble...people died...and... well...other stuff happened" she looked into the menu "Uuuu...I might actually have a cake...cakes are nice"
She was deflecting and Yaz knew she was, she was debating whether to continue asking or just drop the subject. But for some reason Clara seemed keener talking today so she thought she takes her chance. "Is that when your wife was hurt?"
"Mmmmm...yes" Clara answered without looking up. Her eyes still on the menu. She took a big sigh and looked up at her finally "Anyway...when we came next time the lab was burnt down and all the live subjects...people and creatures killed and they were gone"
"Fuck...I’m so sorry"
"I've spent years following bread crumbs...anything I could find all over the universe, different planets, different places, different cases. People kept being taken, always the same story...but I never found what I was looking for Yaz"
"So what changed? Why now?"
"Jack found out stuff...case he was working on. Same thing...but he had more information. So, I decided to follow it up. Cake?" She smiled
"Yeah...they look really nice. I can't wait to see our cake...give me a hint?...Come oooon...one little hint.."
Clara smiled "Blue"
"Blue? OMG...Tardis blue? It is, isn't it?"
"Yeah" she laughed "But also something else...it's both you and me Yaz...you'll see" she smiled
"Aaaaaaaa...I just wanna jump to that day now"
Clara fell silent. She flipped through the cake shop menu like it was a book she was reading, and now Yaz was starting to feel guilty for bringing up the subject, feeling like she'd completely ruined her day. So, she reached for her hand across the table "Baaabe...I'm so sorry for asking this...thank you for telling me"
"No, Yaz it's alright" she lifted her gaze "honest...I was just thinking"
"About what baby?"
"Antonio Latini"
"Who?" she frowned confused
"Antonio Latini...a man working for a Spanish Viceroy in Naples. He lived from 1642 to 1692 and he is credited with being the first person to write down a recipe for sorbetto. He is also responsible for creating a milk-based sorbet, which most culinary historians consider the first official ice cream"
"Fuck me babe"
"Yaz!!!!...language" she turned around embarrassed "You really are a potty mouth"
"I thought you're depressed over what we were talking about"
"Oh, that...no Yaz...I was going to tell you more. I rather tell you than you keep snooping around my desk"
"Whaaaa?"
"Oh, I know you have...3000 years old baby...can't full me" she winked
"OMG...no way"
"Way Yaz...my file was moved for exactly five and a half centimeters to the left...so you did look missy" she pointed finger at her
"I'm sorry...I shouldn't have done that"
"No, you really shouldn't...just don't want you doing something silly Yaz. So pleeease in a future ask me...Now...can we please order this cake before I starve to death and can you please, pleeeease not swear like that in public...it's really horid Yaz, not to mention highly embarrassing"
"Alright Bighead...I'm so sorry...and that goes for both" she laughed.
β
…
Another week flew by without them even noticing. It was already Friday, and they were packed and ready to go to Oxford. Clara carried all the bags down the stairs while Yaz frantically went through the list, making sure they didn't forget anything. Their clothes would be brought by her mother, but they would be in Oxford for over a week, and Yaz had packed anything and everything she could think of that they might need.
"You know Yaz I should've just put the whole house in a Tardis...how many bags do we have?"
"Six...and two small ones"
"Stars Yaz we are not relocating to Oxford"
"No...but we are staying for over a week and we are getting married and the weather is still neither here or there so I'm just making sure we have everything we need"
"I assure you we have more than you think we have"
"What does that supposed to mean?"
"Neverminded" she took last two bags and dragged them down the stairs
Yaza's way of packing always made Clara laugh because she would put a note in the front pocket with a list of everything in that bag so they always knew which bag contained which things at all times. Clara's method of packing was to simply shove everything in hoping she could close it and if that didn't work she would sit on it and use her sonic to lock it.
"Right missy all packed...all ready to go, get your cute but downstairs so I can secure the house"
"Alright...coming...did you turn off the water?"
"Yes"
"Gas?"
"Yeees...Yaz come on...stop doodling"
"Alright...going!!"
Clara made sure all the windows were locked, then she opened the drawer of the side table and took something out of it, putting it in her pocket. Before leaving, she took one more look at their bedroom and smiled a little. She will return there with her wife. Yaz had been her wife for many years, but this time she would bear her name and even though this custom was not part of her culture, this time it meant a lot to her that they did everything right. She went downstairs to find Yaz standing in the hallway.
"Come on...let's go" she said heading towards the kitchen
"Go where? Car's this way babe" she pointed towards the door
"Oh, we're not taking the car Yaz" she grinned "We're taking the Tardis"
"Whaaaaaa?..." Yaz yelled excited "Are you fucking kidding me?"
"Nope...not at all" she reached for her hand
"And you're gonna drive it?" Yaz though this was the most idiotic question in a world but she was so excited it just came out all wrong. Also do you drive a time ship or you fly it, she thought to herself and then dropped it because it really didn't matter at this point because her heart was racing so much she couldn't breathe
"You bet I will..."
"Oh, the bags" she tugged on her hand"
"They're already in a Tardis Yaz"
"OMFG we're going with Tardis...I'm shaking" she said as Clara led her through the kitchen
"I know I'm holding your hand Yaz" she laughed as they walked out into the garden and pointed sonic at the house securing it until they come back
Tardis door was already open and she stepped inside with Yaz following. Her eyes widen and she couldn't stop smiling. Her heart was beating so fast like the first time they kissed. Tardis hummed and all the lights came up.
"Hey girl...I know right exiting" Yaz said smiling
Clara was already at the console and flipped the switches. She looked up smiling as her hearts skipped a beat seeing Yaz on the other side of the console just before they left. She missed all the beautiful parts anyway. And being back at the console made her hearts beat that much faster. She continued walking around the console setting everything up. Yaz watched her in amazement. There she was, her Clara behind the console of her ship ready to fly her away. It was unreal in so many ways and she didn't know what to expect. Clara brushed her fingers over the lever and took a deep breath.
"Ready?" she smiled
"Yeah" Yaz couldn't stop smiling
"C'mere " she nodded her head and as Yaz walked over she pulled her in front of her "Go on...put your hand on it...we're doing this together"
"Are you for real?"
"I was last time I checked" she smiled
Yaz put her hand on the lever and Clara put hers over. She slipped her other hand around her waist holding her tight so she doesn't fall "Let's go" she winked and pulled it down
As Tardis took off Yaz grabbed herself for the console. She didn't expect such a bumpy ride. But before she had time to even get her baring's Tardis screeched to a stop.
"What just happened?" she said confused
"We arrived Yaz" Clara laughed
"You're joking?"
"No...not at all" she grabbed her hand "Come on" she grinned heading towards the door
Yaz still couldn't walk fast and getting to the door was so painfully slow as she just wanted to run "Look Yaz...Oxford" she opened the door
"I can't believe this...this took literally less than a minute"
"I know right....come on...let's get all the bags out...the Hotel is right there" she points across the road
"What about Tardis?...You're just gonna leave her here like this in front of the museum?"
"Now you know why she looks like a telephone box Yaz" she said grabbing most of the bags in her hands "Clever, right?"
Yaz rolled her eyes smiling "Hey...wait...we don't need all of those now...some are just for the wedding"
"Oh!" Clara said dumping all the bags back on the floor
"Your lectures are until Friday...then we move to the other hotel...so just take those three for now"
"Right...well that makes it easier.... coming to think about it we didn't need the hotel Yaz...we could've just stayed in a Tardis"
"Now you say that!" Yaz said as they walked outside
"We can you know..." she said casually hoping she'll agree
"Than why are we going to a hotel?" Yaz stopped in the middle of the road
"I don't know Yaz" she stopped and turned around.
"Seriously?" Yaz shrugged her shoulders pointing towards the Tardis
"Brilliant!" Clara said with a massive grin passing next to her in a hurry back towards the Tardis booting the door open "I mean since we came with her..."
Yaz laughed all the way inside "You silly sod."
Clara walked past their old room and opened the door to another. It was a large room with a firm dark wooden bed and two side tables. Built-in wardrobe and chest of drawers next to it. There was a dark blue armchair in the corner of the room, and a small round table next to it. The Tardis patterns on the walls reached all the way to the ceiling. This was Yaz's old room before she moved into hers. She placed the bags on the navy blue sheets...the ones she had slept on so many nights before. She smiled a little and left the room.
"Babeeeee" Yaz yelled from the kitchen
"Coming" she said and rushed down the hallway "Yes lovely?" she peaked from the door
"We will have to go shopping you know" Yaz said holding a container of her root killer she took out of the fridge
Clara walked over and took it out of her hand dumping it on a kitchen top and wrapped her arms around her pulling her in "Are you sure you're alright with this Yaz? We can go to a hotel it's literally across the road"
"I am... honest" she said running hands down her dark chocolate braces and her white shirt "I wanna be here...besides you know I get anxious in hotels. This feels more like a home"
"Alright butterfly...just take it easy your leg still hurts. I need to switch on the heating...it's quite cold in here. In fact, this weekend I should check all the other stuff. I also need to pick up the car from rentals"
"Waaaw we have a spaceship and a car...luxury" she smiled playing with a collar of her shirt
"Neah..." she scrunched her face "It's only a car Yaz...we need one...Tardis was sitting a long time I don't feel like hopping around short distances until I make sure everything works properly. Don't wanna miss the wedding"
"Miss the wedding?"
"Arrrr you know, sometimes Tardis can miss things here and there...few years, months...not often but I don't want to risk it"
"Right..." she had no idea what she was going on about but at this point she didn't really care. All she cared about was how Clara smelled divine and how her lips were and inch away from hers
"We can go shopping for food once we unpack...I do fancy...." Yaz cut her off within a kiss pulling her by the braces "sandwich" she said as they parted
"Can I ask you a really stupid question"
"No question is stupid Yaz"
"Does Tardis listen to everything...you know...stuff that goes on"
Clara laughed slumping her head on her shoulder "Right...well...sort of...but she knows when to be polite...does that answers your question?"
"Yeah...it does" she was relieved in so many ways
"Come on...let's get the car and get some food..."
….
"Nope, nope...we have a whole suitcase of those" she took custard creme box out of her hand and put it back on a shelf "We need potatoes and actual food"
"That is food"
"For you maybe...I need potatoes" she rolled her eyes laughing
"Alright...anything else whiles I'm there?"
"Aaaarrr yeah...salad, some tomatoes, oh get apples as well....in fact here" she tore a paper with a shopping list in half "...get all this"
"Alright...oh don't forget Froot loops Yaz"
"I won't" she rolled her eyes laughing. Before she moved in, Clara mostly ate in restaurants or wherever she could get her hands on. Her kitchen was half empty, with mostly just sweets packed away in the cupboards, and the fridge was no different. For someone with the intelligence of 10 people combined, she was absolutely useless when it came to simple things like buying food so Yaz always made a list, but somehow other things would always end up on that list, mostly random candy that would saw her in the store and was simply attracted by the cute packaging like a child. Some of it tasted absolutely disgusting, but Clara still liked it. Yaz got used to some of her very strange eating habits, like putting sugar on her pizza or curry on her lasagna, and over time she just started to ignore it. It was all part of Clare. She released that she wasn't coming back for a while, so she took the trolley to the candy department, knowing for sure that she would be found there. And she did, standing in front of the peanut butter shelf loading the biggest package she could find into the trolley that was already completely packed out with sweets.
"Hey hamster...what have you been packing up?" she laughed looking at the trolley
"Hey" she smiled dumping the massive pot into the trolley
"OMG...how much stuff did you get?"
"You know I'll eat all of it in few days" she laughed "I got some popcorn for a movie night"
"Yeah and then I end up eating it with you and getting fat" she laughed "Let's get our of here"
Clara parked the car right in front of Tardis and went out opening the booth taking all the shopping out. The sight was so unreal that Yaz started to laugh uncontrollably.
"What?" Clara stood confused holding loads of shopping bags
"We are taking shopping inside the police telephone box" she laughed like crazy holding on to the car "I mean...look...it's a telephone box Clara" she laughed so much she couldn't breathe. The thought of random people on a street seeing them walking into a police telephone box with loads of Sainsbury bags was so out there she just couldn't stop laughing
"Stars Yaz" Clara started laughing "I didn't think of it that way..."
"I mean...don't you ever think what people think when you get in and out?"
"No, not really" she said walking inside
"Do you just park anywhere?"
"Pretty much yes" she said walking towards the kitchen
"I mean...you travelled through time right? A telephone box is hardly inconspicuous if you're say in ancient Rome....What the hell do people think it is?"
"Dunno Yaz...usually I'm too busy to think about that" she said dumping shopping on the kitchen top
….
Their room was comfortable and Yaz loved the hum of the Tardis coming from inside. She hadn't expected it to be heard so far away from the control room. But she found it calming. She had just finished unpacking and lay down on the bed running her hand over the dark blue covers looking up at the high ceiling and all the hexagonal patterns on the walls. She felt the vibrations even as she lay on the bed, and they went right through her. She also now discovered how Clara's home décor mimicked the Tardis in so many ways with the same colors and dark brown furniture. She was curious about what Gallifrey looked like and if this style was something that reminded her of her home or if it was just something that won her hearts on Earth. In many ways the Tardis was grand and full of luxury, but in other ways it was so simple. Just a big house filled with thousands of years of memories. The gentle hum of the Tardis lulled her to sleep, and Clara found her curled up on the bed without the covers. It was still cold inside the ship as the systems were still heating it. She lifted the blanket from the armchair and covered her. It felt so special to be able to see her here again, so special after all these years that Clara could just sit on the edge of the bed and watch her sleep. At last, she felt laughter and happiness return within these walls as the decades passed in loneliness and sorrow, and the old ship knew only of silence and pain. There was nothing but the echo of some good times lost to her. Memories of special moments spent together and the life they built together. She felt blessed to have that chance again, because Yaz had fallen in love with her all over again, and she was determined not to waste a single minute of their time together as much as possible. She stroked her head and placed a long kiss on her forehead, then left the room, closing the door quietly.
There was a lot to do now that the ship was in operation, and they would be living inside for a week. So, she changed into her blue trousers and rainbow t-shirt, buttoned up her apron and put her goggles on top of her head. Yaz woke up after nearly two hours of sleep to hear loud music echoing through the Tardis
Clara was bobbing her head and wiggled her bum in the cutest way pulling some wires out of one of the walls. There were large cables on the floor and some black liquid leaking into a plastic bucket from one of the hoses.
"Hey sexy" she laughed coming down the stairs
"Hey sleepy...rested?"
"Yap...slept like baby...why didn't you wake me up? I could help you" she came up pulling her for the apron
"Oi, I'll make you dirty"
"It's fine...engine oil is sexy" she pulled her by the apron into a kiss
"Blimey If you say so" she laughed
"Soo...can I help?" Yaz asked taking some part of Tardis that was on a floor into her hand looking at it
Clara looked at her taken back a little then grinned haply "Yeah...sure you can...In fact I need to sort out the swimming pull and I can use an extra pair of hands"
"You weren't joking about swimming pool"
"No Yaz I really wasn't " she said throwing her tools into a bag "Come on" she nodded
"Then why would you...you have a whole forest in here...with a lake...swimming pool is like a toaster compared to that" she said walking behind her
"Talking about toaster I need to buy a new one"
"I thought you said Tardis can make stuff?"
"She can Yaz...it's just more fun buying it. In fact, I do make most of my kitchen appliances I just don't have time now"
"I know my adorable genius" she laughing and slapped her bum
….
"Yaaaz I need you to release the pressure. It's a big red valve inside the little door in a wall on your right" she said holding the massive hose in her hand attaching it to a shaft in a wall "Turn it clockwise until I tell you to stop" she said locking the hose into the wall with her sonic "Alright that's it...all done...you just need to..." she turned around and smiled "kick that door shut" she said looking at her haply
"Done...Now what?"
She smiled as it was Yaz's automatic reaction to shut the tricky little door who's hinge was broken forever "Now we wait few minutes until the water changes" she said sitting on the steps
"It's a lot of work maintaining this place" she sat on a step below leaning on her chest
"It is but I like it...keeps me busy most times...it gets a bit lonely...but now I have you" she smiled kissing the top of her head " I need some food I'm starving"
"Me too...Making your favorite"
"Lasagna?"
"Yap..."
"Brilliant ...I do fancy some lasagna"
…
Yaz was in a kitchen finishing a salad whiles Clara was still running around Tardis. She had no idea where she was or what she was doing but she was gone for nearly two hours. A phone rang and Yaz quickly reached over to the bar.
"Hey mum"
"Hi honey, have you arrived?"
"Oh, yeah...ages ago"
"Oh...that fast?"
"Aaarrh...yeeeeah...we left early...just give me a second...making a salad"
"Whaaa?...Salad? Aren't you in a hotel?"
"Oh...about that...no were not...Clara rented a cottage for a week...surprise"
"Oh did she...how nice...I suppose it's more intimate"
"Yeah...that's right...much better than a hotel"
"Just calling you to tell you I've picked up all your clothes. They look so beautiful honey...I can't stop looking at them...I've hang them on my wardrobe" she laughs
"Aaaaaaaa....so exited...I can't wait to put it on...I'm legit combusting"
"Hey Yaz?..." Clara walked into the kitchen
"Hey baby...I'm speaking to mum...just told her what a nice cottage you rented" she was saying making faces
Clara frowned confused then clocked on to what she was saying "Oh...yes very nice...hey Nadjia" she yelled into Yaz's phone
"Wait mum...I'll put you on a loud speaker"
"Hi Clara...I just told Yaz...your garments are stunning I just picked them up today"
"Thank you so much for doing that Najia I appreciate it"
"Oh, don't worry hun...You have picked up your rings?"
"Yes...we got them on Monday" Clara said
"They are beautiful...also mum I was gonna ask you...about my hair. I know it's a last minute but I couldn't go around shopping...can you please pleaseeeee look for some nice braided extension for me"
"You have beautiful hair Yaz...why do you need extension?"
"I wanna have a beautiful long braid like nanny's"
"Alright hun...I'll have a look"
"Thanks mum"
"I need to run now baby...you two have a nice time and Clara please make sure she rests"
"I am but she's stubborn" she laughs "It's a challenge I must admit"
"She was born stubborn...you'll see one day when you have your own kid"
"Muuuum"
"Just saying Yaz"
"Bye muuuum" she rolled her eyes and hang up the phone "Sorry"
"Mmmm...what for Yaz" she kissed the side of her head and took the salad "Is the food done?"
"I think so...where have you been all this time?"
"Just doing some small repairs"
"Come on...let's eat"
….
The evening came and they curled up on the sofa like at home and watched a movie. It was still a little cold in the Tardis, but that was just an excuse to snuggle closer. Clara slowly ran her fingers through Yaz's hair making her sleepy. Even Clara was getting tired as she spent most of the day hovering around the Tardis sorting things out. Most of Tadis had been pretty much neglected for the past 57 years as all her enthusiasm for it had died down and she spent all her time obsessing over finding the people responsible for hurting Yaz. She stopped caring about everything except the animals she had on board. Everything else gathered dust, forgotten, frozen in time like something from "Great Expectations".
Yaz was looking forward to her first night on the Tardis like a kid. It was exiting for her and she knew she won't get this chance again very soon, if ever again. So, she was determined to make the best out of it. The gentle humming of the Tardis made it special and now with their stuff unpacked their room felt more as a home and less as a hotel. Tardis was in many ways blowing her mind and there was no mistake that it came from some other world but also it absolutely fascinated her how Earth looking it really was in many ways with rooms and bathrooms practically the same as in any household, kitchen that was more ordinary than the one they had in their house. She loved the simplicity and the warmth of it.
She snuggled into bed going through her messages waiting for Clara who was finishing in the bathroom. She was very quiet which was unusual for her and Yaz wasn't sure was it anything to do with the Tardis or she was just simply exhausted from a long day. Clara clapped her hands and lights dimmed then draped herself over Yaz taking her phone out of her hand kissing her cheek
"Oi..I was in the middle of something"
"I'm more important" she grinned
"Oh are you now?" she laughed and wrapped her arms around her shoulders
"You're not in pain?"
"Nope...it's going...only when I walk for a long time and I still can't bend my knee properly...You're getting cold and your bum is naked you will freeze" she said running hands over her bare shoulders and down her back "Come" she said lifting the duvet and Clara snuggled herself in
"You're healing nicely...just please don't go mad tomorrow when I'm on a lecture" Clara spoke into her neck rubbing her face on her
"I won't...are you alright baby? You're very quiet"
"Just tiered butterfly...I'm very happy your here"
"I'm happy I'm here...this is so exiting...never been on a spaceship...I must say this is your best date ever" she said gently stroking her back
"Why didn't I think of it before then?" she laughed but she sounded so tired and already half asleep
"Come on darling...let's sleep" Yaz said reaching out for the little side lamp "Arrh...baby...how do I switch that off?"
"Oh...sorry Yaz...just tab it at the top like this"
Yaz pulled the covers over them and entwined their legs. Clara was asleep in less than a minute with her face pressed against Yaz's neck. Her nose right under Yaz's ear and her breathing tickled her. She smiled as she moved her head slightly and was met with a murmur from Clara who squirmed and slid her hand down Yaz's side and fell back asleep. Yaz lay awake for a while looking up at the high ceiling and the dim amber lights that filtered through the hexagonal patterns on the walls. It was very quiet, except for the humming of the Tardis which sounded like the breathing of this giant inside the tiny blue box.
That night she had a silly dream about traveling with Clara to some crazy far away world and sitting on a mattress by the open door of the Tardis and looking at the stars somewhere far away in space. She dreamed of Clara teaching her how to steer her beloved ship and smiling proudly at her across the console. Then morning came and humming woke her with the chirping of birds in the room. The light was as bright as the morning sun coming through the windows, but there were no windows in their room. Yaz rolled on the warm bed smiling
"Morning beautiful...that's a nice way to wake up...I wonder what else you can do?" Tardis hummed "So it's just you and me today...I'm planning on a surprise for Clara and I'm gonna need your help...God I really hope you understand me or I sound like right idiot now" she laughed then Tardis flickered the lights and hummed again and she opened her eyes wide "OMG you really do understand everything I say...You're one amazing girl I give you that" she said with a yawn and grabbed Clara's pillow shoving her face into it then saw a small note attached to the lamp
"Morning butterfly, I hope you had some nice dreams...You know you need to remember your dreams when you sleep somewhere for the first time and make a wish...I'm rambling...Anyway...I'm off to work and I left you something in a kitchen. Please take it easy. I miss you already. Yours forever Clara...Doctor...Wife...xxx"
She shook her head laughing at the note then rolled herself out of bed.
…
She walked into the kitchen and there was a whole breakfast waiting for her with one more note attached to the tea cup "Didn't make a tea because by the time you wake up it would evaporate ...Love ya xx"
Yaz laughed because if it wasn't for the Tardis getting her up at 9am she'd be spot on.
She quickly got dressed and started cleaning, starting with the control room. Tardis played her music and made it more fun. She would ask her about things, and she could swear she heard her reply. While cleaning the console, she ran her hand over all the controls. There were so many of them and now she took the time to take a better look at them. All little switches and some floating screens that showed Gallifreyan stuff. She remembered her dream and smiled as her heart skipped a beat. Then she thought how difficult it must be for Clara to give up all this, her life was so intertwined in this ship as if they were breathing as one being. Only now could she fully understand Clara's attachment to her little blue box, and her heart ached for her. She thought of how many centuries her beautiful Clara had spent at this console and the places she had been, what her eyes had seen, and she gave up on all of it. She sighed deeply and ran her fingertips over the lever. "Oh honey…I'm so sorry," she whispered and then turned around taking a deep breath
"So, what ya think? Looking nice and clean!" she said happily standing back a bit
Tardis hummed and switched all the lights on the console making it look absolutely magical.
"Wooooow...look at that! I really like this" she took a bucket and all the mops "Right...let's get the kitchen sorted properly then check the rooms and... well I don't know. Just hope I don't get lost."
β
β
Clara was on her break and tried calling Yaz several times, but no one answered. She was getting more and more worried and was about to leave the university to go check on her when her phone rang
"Yaz! Is everything alright?"
"Yeah baby...so sorry I see you called..."
"Seven times Yaz!...Seven time...where are you? You nearly had me regenerate" she said stressfully shoving a straw through the plastic lid of her shake
"I'm really sorry...I left my phone in a kitchen"
"I thought you've fallen and hurt yourself or...never mind I'm just chuffed I finally got you on a phone"
"Noo babe...I'm fine silly...I'm not dead rotting in your kitchen"
"Yaaaaz!!...That's not even funny"
She laughed "Alright I was gonna call you anyway...darling...where's the hoover?"
"The what Yaz?"
"Hoover...you know...for hoovering the floors...you do have one?"
"Nooooo Yaz...why would I have a hoover?" she frowned confused and scrunched her face
"Baaaabe" she whined at the other end
"Yaaaaz...are you cleaning?"
"Yes...of course I'm cleaning...what do you think I need a hoover for? My hair?...Well how the fuck do I clean the floors babe?"
Clara almost spilled the shake blowing bubbles through the straw as she burst out laughing
"Yaz darling..."
"Yes"
"Aaaaarhhh there's something I forgot to tell you"
"What?" Yaz said dumping a dirty cloth into the sink
"Tardis can clean itself Yaz I just need to turn on the system"
"Whaaaa?...Are you fucking kidding me?"
"Nooo Yaz...I was gonna do that today but I need to check everything....last time it malfunctioned it was not a pleasant site...took a week for all the dust to settle"
"I've just spent four hours cleaning"
Clara ran her fingers over her face "Stars Yaz...." she laughed "Well...you do clean well so I bet it's all nice and shiny"
"Well I was about to do the library" she said stressfully throwing her apron on the kitchen top "Good you told me"
"I bet your bottom lip is popping out now...You sound stressed"
"I swear I'm gonna kill you myself"
"I must say...that threat didn't sound very scary..."
"Oh sod off" she rolled her eyes and started to laugh "Thank you for the breakfast by the way...that was lovely"
"I thought that might make you happy" she smiled haply "Right...well, I need to run now...Love ya"
"Love you too you silly old goof" she hang up the phone and sighed exhausted "Well...you could've told me as well...I guess you're just enjoying in company aren't you?" she shook her head laughing "I can see why you two are the best buddies. Well...let's get this party started. I stink like shit" she lifted the top and smelled herself, then she took all the rags and shoved them into the bucket and headed towards their room
Clara was gone most of the day. She had a lecture and then a board meeting after that so Yaz knew she wouldn't be back before seven. Dinner was almost finished, and she went to change. Her leg was killing her by this point and as she passed the console something clicked and drew her attention to it. She leaned over to look and saw the Tardis pop out of one of those large tables that looked like a giant candy
"Is that for me?...Have you just given me a pain killer?" she said twirling it in her hand and Tarids hummed turning the lights pink "Waaaw...that's so sweet...Thanks beautiful" she smiled and walked towards their room to get ready
Clara drove slowly back, it was a short drive and she hoped to find parking near the Tardis. She was exhausted from a long day, but it was the endless meeting that drained the last drop of energy out of her. It reminded her of Gallifrey and the endless political debates that always made her cringe. But as soon as she got into the car, she felt as if a pile of bricks fell from her back. She also got a call from Jack, and it made her so much happier to know that he was okay. A worry that hadn't left her mind since she agreed to their little deal. Jack feared very little, which made him dangerous to himself and got him into trouble more times than Clara could count. She also hoped he would make it to the wedding because he was the closest thing to a family she'd ever had, and she was absolutely going to miss him pestering her all day.
She parked and walked inside looking around as it was very quiet and lights were dimmed. It was unusual to come back home to the Tardis. She hasn't called it her home in months. She smiled as she passed the console that was shining like never before. Even the lever was all polished clean.
"Hey baby" Yaz called from the top of the steps smiling
"Wooooow....Yaz is that you?" she smiled surprised as she came out dressed in creamy white dress to her knees. She put her hair in a long braid draping over her shoulder.
"Unless you have more women in your life, it's definitely still me" she laughed "trainers" she lifted her leg of the floor "classy" she giggled
"You look stunning...just stunning" she said going up the stairs slowly "Soooo...is this a date night I didn't know about?" she smiled as she climbed the steps
"Yeah well...I think I owe you more than a date" she said as Clara took another step up and wrapped her arms around her laying her head on her chest with a heavy sigh
"Goodness what's that sigh for baby?" Yaz asked stroking her hair
"Just so nice to be home finally...and you don't owe me anything except a cuddle" she looked up smiling "I neeeeed a cuddle"
"And kiss?" Yaz smiled tucking her hair behind her ears
"Mmmm...I could do with that as well"
Yaz kissed her gently showering her her with small, short kisses then smiled into her lips "And some food?"
"You're speaking my language Yaz" she smiled and tangled their fingers together ever so gently
"Come on" Yaz nodded towards the kitchen and pulling her up the steps. Clara draped herself over her back as they stepped into the hallway wrapping her arms around her
"You look amazing Yaz"...she smiled kissing her cheek, her hands ghosting over Yaz's waist before she grabbed her hand again "Tardis is shining, I can see my face on a console...I never saw my face in a console...So did you two have a nice time together?"
"We have actually...now I will miss her when we get home" she smiled as they passed the kitchen"
"I'm confused...where are we going?"
"Oh...you'll see...surprise" Yaz smiled and kissed her cheek. She led her twards the forest and opened the door for her.
"Wooooow!" Clara smiled widely "Yaaaz...this is amazing!"
As soon as they came out, Clara smiled cheerfully. The Tardis built a gazebo and dimmed the lights to match the June evening outside the Tardis. Little fairy lights illuminated all the decorative cast iron arches, and in the middle was a small table for two with soft candlelight which made it even more romantic.
"I really like this...very romantic Yaz" she looked at Yaz smiling "Thank you...I needed this" she said bringing her knuckles to her lips kissing them gently "I see you two become buddies" she smiled and gave her one more short kiss
"Come on...food is getting cold" Yaz pulled her hand and pulled the chair for her "Madam"
"You're making me blush" she sat down and pulled her hand "And I love the service...I need to make sure I leave a review"
"Do you usually kiss the waitresses?" Yaz laughed into her lips
"I swear these lips only kiss you" she smiled
"They better be, or I'm canceling that wedding" she giggled
Clara's fingers brushed hers when Yaz pulled back, not wanting to let her go. Just the touch after a long day made her happy, but it wasn't what she expected. She actually half expected Yaz to be sleeping on the couch in the library since she'd spent the day cleaning the Tardis, which made Clara laugh anyway "Your menu ma'am" she handed her a piece of paper which made her laugh like crazy. Yaz wrote in broken French everything she cooked, from chicken to potatoes and salad. There was some kind of dessert that Clara scrunched her face trying to read out loud.
"Blimey...I have to take you to Paris Yaz" she laughed "Although I think you might stay hungry if I leave you on your own...is that strawberry?"
Yaz laughed "Yeeeees...google translate" she giggled and sat down
"Ok...I'll have that...as long as there's no pears" she laughed
"Nope...Why do you hate pears so much?" she giggled pouring her some juice then opened the lid of the glass dish with food
"Eeeeewwww..." she started making grossed out faces "Neah...pears are horrible"
"And dipping fish fingers into custard is delightful?" Yaz laughed
"You really should try Yaz...it really is"
"Neah thanks...I'll stick to mayo. So what's with today baby? You were so stressed when you came back"
"Meeting Yaz...I hate them with a passion...Mmmmmm" she mumbled as she took a first bite of chicken in breadcrumbs and then took some mash potatoes quickly "Stars Yaz this is soo nice...Will you marry me?" she laughed
"Sure babe...when?"
"We can do it quickly next Saturday then elope"
"Neah...that's a long time to wait...can't we do it now?"
"We could on Gallifrey...here everything takes so long" she laughed "I tell you we nearly missed it Yaz...I completely forgot those papers"
"You're stressed, that's all. Oh, my maid of honor is coming on Friday so you will finally get to meet her"
"I'm so excited to meet her...Well, my fam is coming on Friday as well. We could all go out for a meal"
"That would be nice"
Clara never met any of Yaz's friends because she didn't have any really. Few girls from work that get to invite her for birthday parties but no more than that. And those friends she did have before, have all moved away so she was excited more than Clara.
"Slow down darling...you're meant to enjoy in this not just shove it down your throat" Yaz laughed
"I'm starving and I missed your cooking as well Yaz. I manage but it's not the same really"
"You were getting better with time" she laughed
Yaz reached across the table for her hand and hooked her finger at hers "Thank you for everything...I know that wasn't easy for you, handling your job and house all the shopping, cooking and taking care of me like a baby"
"Don't be silly Yaz..." she said not taking her eyes of the food "You know I would..."
"Ssssshhh...wait...I know you don't want me to thank you, but I am. With a wedding as well, that was just madness and I'm not even going to mention that case you're working on. But you haven't complained once, or raised your voice at me or being techy with me...And I love you so so much for it...So it's time for me to spoil you rotten and that's exactly what I plan to do" she smiled brushing her thumb over Clara's hand
"Waaaaw Yaz...you're making me soppy now" she smiled as her eyes filled with tears "I just did what had to be done...it's what you do...you love me I love you...so we do stuff " She left the fork on a side and pushed her chair back pulling Yaz by her hand "C'mere"
Yaz got up and made herself comfortable in her lap
"I just feel bad for you" she said wrapping her arms around her shoulders "You're so tiered and exhausted Clara, physically and mentally. And mentally since I've known you...and that's going on for a long time....way before you even met me...I just don't want you burning out"
"I'm not gonna burn out Yaz. I had worse...believe me I have, but hopefully those days are behind me. And I'm so sorry iff I made you feel that way...I'm sorry for scaring you butterfly"
"You promise to tell me...promise to tell me everything, at least how you feel? I wanna know, I don't want you hiding it from me pretending you're fine until you're braking at every seam?"
Clara's eyes roamed around her face for a moment in silence. She hasn't answered straight away just looked at her for a short moment like debating this request with herself and deciding if she can honor it. She pursed her lips and her chest raised in a deep sigh before she finally gave her an answer.
"I promise...I have been crying enough for three regenerations anyway" she turned it quickly into a joke, but Yaz wasn't laughing she just brought her hand to her cheek and stroke her face gently with her knuckles.
"I can't lose you. I can't breathe without you so at least I need to know when you need me to be there to stop you from falling"
"You're never gonna lose me cause that bit's not even an option" she said rocking her and brushed her nose against her cheek "And I can't fall when I'm with you Yasmin even if I tried"
"Good...cause that's not an option" she smiled
Clara's hand traveled to the back of her neck capturing her lips in a deep, passionate kiss leaving her breathless then she parted just slightly and smiled
"...Now where's that strawberry cake, cause I really fancy some?"
"You'll get it if you stop kissing me like that or we might skip the dessert" she smiled playing with the hair at the back of her neck then slowly slipped out of her lap
It was late and after chatting for hours they both fell silent, just Clara gently brushing her thumb over the side of Yaz's hand
"Take me to bed" Clara said quietly
Yaz smiled and stood up walking around the table still holding her hand. She stood between her parted legs and smiled as Clara pressed her lips to her stomach and wrapped her arms around it, then rested her forehead against it. Yaz's fingers running through her hair were soothing. She was tired and exhausted, but she needed this evening more than anything in the past few weeks. She was finally starting to feel a little calmer and just a little more normal. Everything was still there, all the worries she had, but just knowing now even vaguely what was happening to Yaz made her feel that much more hopeful. This part she knew she could handle. It was losing her that she couldn't.
Yaz was taking off her earrings and putting them in a small jewelry box her nanny had given her for one of her birthdays. She slowly loosened her braid, letting her long hair fall over her shoulders. It was a long day for both of them. Her leg was absolutely killing her by this point and she knew deep down that she only had herself to blame this time for pushing herself beyond her limits in a desperate need to feel normal and healthy. She felt a strange burning sensation in it that she had never felt before and debated if she should say anything to Clara since she was so tired, Yaz saw that her eyes couldn't focus anymore during dinner, so she gave up on it for now and decided to tell her the following day. Sunday will be more normal for both of them because Clara only had a two hour lecture at the university for some American students and she was going to join her for it. She was looking forward to it as she hasn't been on it for quite some time and Clara's lectures were always fun for her to listen to. Her debating with the students and rambling one information after the other pouring out of her beautiful mind. Yaz unzipped her dress and pulled it over her sides then draped it over the blue armchair in a corner of their room. She also folded Clara's clothes and threw her shirt into the hole in the wall, which Clara showed her was for dirty laundry. She wasn't going to shower again, but she thought the warm water might soothe her sore leg, so she took off the rest of her clothes and stepped into the bathroom.
"Hiya" Clara peaked through the shower door "I knew you're gonna change your mind" she smiled and opened the door
"It was too tempting," she said stepping into the steamy cubicle pressing herself against Clara's chest kissing her collarbones. Her arm wrapped around her as she closed the door with the other and then her attention was fully on Yaz with her arms wrapped around her, she moved them both under the water that was running down Yaz's back as she buried her head into her chest. Clara's memories flashed before her eyes as they both stood in the same looking bathroom as the one just a few doors down in their old room from 57 years ago. 57 years she hadn't set foot in that bathroom down the hall and now she had Yaz in her arms again, cuddling her, running her gentle beautiful hands all over her in much the same way, cradling her sleepy head into her chest as she did so many years ago. Clara ran a hand down the nape of her neck over her heavy water-soaked hair. She was lost in her memories for a moment until Yaz looked up blinking her long eyelashes from the water splashing her face and smiled gently at her.
"Feels nice" she said smiling and melted Clara's hearts down that drain
She kissed her forehead and the tip of her nose stroking her wet hair then reached for the bottle of body wash from the little shelf
Yaz took a small step back holding herself for Clara's hip as her leg was seriously hurting her by this point "What do bathrooms look like on Gallifrey?"
She smiled as Yaz's question snapped her out her melancholy. "Oh, well.... what do bathrooms look like anywhere Yaz...all pretty much similar really. But we do like baths rather than showers. I just have no patience for a bath...takes way to long to fill it up" she grinned and squeezed a soap on top of her head
"Aaaaa...not that much silly" she giggled
Clara wrapped her in a big fluffy towel and reached over her shoulder pressing display on a wall. The whole bathroom turned into a big massive hairdryer that dried Yaz's hair in a record time making her giggle as it felt like they stepped into a massive hot fan. But the result made her laugh even more as her hair curled up instantly and it was a fuzzy mess sticking out like she stuck her finger in a socket.
"OMG" she looked at herself in a mirror "WTF" she laughed
"Looks cute Yaz" Clara said casually standing behind her and kissed her shoulder
"You think everything looks cute on me. Thank god I packed your straighteners" she said slipping underneath the covers
"Here... open" Clara stood by the bed with candy looking tablet "You're limping trying to hide it" she raised her eyebrow "Oh, aaand holding on to me in a shower I might add"
"Sorry" she pouted her lip
"Why are you hiding it Yaz? In fact, you're doing incredibly well. It does take almost eight weeks to heal and you're already walking on it without a support. It's amazing" she said climbing the bed and slipped under the covers "You silly sod" she said wrapping her arms around her as Yaz draped herself over her chest
The burning sensation didn't go away, but she was still calm even though it scared her a little. It was very late and although they both desperately wanted this evening to end on a more romantic note, they were both so tired and exhausted that cuddling was about as far as they had the energy tonight. But having this evening all to themselves meant so much to both of them.
Yaz shifted more leaning her head on her hand looking at Clara lovingly with a slight smile on her face.
"What?" Clara turned towards her "What's the cute look?"
"I'm happy...really happy...And you're gonna be mine" she said exited
Clara turned towards her smiling and reached for the curly lock of her hair that was falling over her face "I already am yours Yaz...this is just a formality"
"I know… but anyway… you'll be rightfully mine… Forever and ever" she giggled, wrapping her fingers around Clara's face and brushing a small spot next to her ear with her thumb.
"Pretty, right Yaz," she smiled and leaned over to kiss her gently. "Are you sure you want me to wake you up for tomorrow's lecture?"
Absolutely," Yaz said, draping her leg over her side and snuggling into her arms again. Clara kissed her softly, her hand lazily trailing down her back with small tender kisses, but she was already half asleep, as was Yaz. So she pulled her head into her neck and hugged her with her arm
"Nightie night baby" she said into her neck"
"Yaz"
"Yes baby?"
"Thank you for tonight...I'm sorry I'm so tiered"
"Chill...you have your whole life to make it up to me" she giggled and kissed her neck making Clara laugh
"Well, when you put it that way" she laughed and kissed her on the head "Nightie night butterfly"
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