"Hey lovely...ready to go?" Clara peaked through the bedroom door

"Yeah...I just need you to zip me up please" she turned around and smiled as Clara ran her finger down the length of her spine "I said zip me up not put me to bed silly" she giggled turning over her shoulder

"I can do both" Clara said cheeky and kissed her quickly zipping up her dress "You look beautiful" she smiled wrapping her hands around her locking them on her stomach

"Mmmmm....I needed that cuddle" she hummed palming her hands leaning on her then turned in her arms "And youuuu smell so nice I wanna stay home" she smiled running hands down her chest "short sleeves....mmmm" she said raising her eyebrow and trailed fingertips up her arms

"Now...who's trying to get who into bed here Yaz...I'm getting confused" she looked down at what she was doing

Yaz put a finger underneath her chin raising her gaze "I'll take a rain check" she said and kissed her sufficiently enough to make Clara's head spin then just passed next to her and grabbed her bag from the bed "Come on...let's go"

Clara shook her head and turned around "I don't think I can wait that long Yaz...what's the time?"

"Late" she laughed going down the stairs

It was the first time since their conversation that Clara saw the cheeky side of Yaz she missed so much. It brought her comfort and hope things will slowly get back to how they were before. Although she knew that love and passion they felt for each other hasn't gone it had the undertone of sadness in Yaz's eyes even in the most intimate of moments leaving Clara with aching hearts.

She rushed down the stairs and opened the door for Yaz who was carrying relatively large birthday cake

"Card?" she said

"Got it" Clara said

"Present?"

"It's already in a car butterfly"

"Oh...oh...baby please get me that pot for dad...I left it on a kitchen top...Mum brought food the other day in it"

Clara rushed back into the house and got the pot from the counter. "Is that it?"

"Yap...let's go"

.....


"Hey love birds" Hakim smiled haply opening  the door "Sonya they're here!!!....Waaaw Yaz that cake looks awesome"

"Thanks dad...let's hope it tastes awesome" she smiled "I finally remembered that pot"

"Hello" Clara smiled "Pot" she lifted the bag

"Thanks honey" Hakim hugged her

"Happy birthday Sonya" Clara hugged her

"Thaaaaank you...You look lovely"

"Thanks...Yaz loves the short sleeves"

"I bet she does" she laughed

"Yaz honey...oh hi Clara" Nadjia came up and kissed Clara's cheek "How are you darling?"

"Not bad...still on a holiday...I just have the most boring meetings at work now...I do prefer lectures...Going to Oxford this weekend"

"And to Ireland" Hakim added as they were all sitting at the table

"Aaaaa Ireland...can't wait...I'm so chuffed about that...Thank you so much...what a beautiful  present"

"She just can't wait to show me all the castles" Yaz laughed "And that cottage is so adorable...You really didn't have to spend so much money on us"

"Nonsense Yaz...it's your honeymoon darling...I just want loads of pictures and bring me a little  rock"

Yaz laughed "Muuum...you can't always ask for rocks...I'll bring you normal present...and a rock" she rolled her eyes

"I have a very big rock collection" Clara said "...I completely understand the passion"

"See ...I'm not the only one" Nadjia said proudly

"No fucking way you two" Sonya screamed

"Like it?" Yaz turned around

"I freaking love it"

"It's a very good speck" Clara said "And the picture quality is really high. You need a good phone to take pretty photos for your store"

"It's really awesome."

"Oh oh...and there's cover for it in a bottom of the bag" Yaz said

"Noooo way...It's the one I told you I loved so much"

"Yeaaaah and it didn't match your phone...Well...now it does" Yaz smiled

"Clara babe...When's your birthday?" Sonya asked

"Oh...I..."

"November..." Yaz jumped in and their eyes locked across the table "10th of November....funny that...we just met afterwards"

"Right...yeah" Clara nodded grinning

"Well I'm putting it in my diary so I don't forget" Sonya said "I'm so lousy in remembering birthdays"

"Oh me too.." Clara said, "We don't have those...arh...I mean the diary...we don't have a diary at home either...I should get one...I love diaries" she got flustered

"Here we go girls..." Hakim brought a baking tray with steaming hot food and placed it on a table "Clara your gonna love this. I changed the recipe a bit...It's creamier now"

"I always love what you cook" her eyes grew wide and the smell was hypnotic almost

"So you're leaving on Friday?" Sonya asked

"Yeah..." Yaz said taking her mum's plate and filling it up "We're going to Oxford first then to Ireland"

"Are you flying out?"

"Yes..." Clara said "I'll just take a rental when we are there"

"That's a lot of driving for you...first to Oxford then back then go to Ireland" Nadjia said

"Oh, I don't mind it...besides we take it easy and always have few stops on a way...it's nice...Unless the weather is bad...which now it shouldn't be"

"Noo...you're going at the right time...just before the autumn"

"Talking about that...Yaz and me were chatting...Last year we went to Scotland for Christmas...it's where we got engaged...And weeeeee thought I'd be really nice if you joined us this year. I know you don't celebrate Christmas but just as a family holiday"

"Oh..." Nadjia said surprised "Oh honey that would be beautiful...But are you sure you want all of us there? I mean...don't you two want time for yourself?"

"We will have time to ourselves mum" Yaz said "But I'd be really nice to have everyone there as well...Clara's family is coming as well you know"

"Or are they?" Hakim smiled "Isn't that nice Clara"

"Yeah I'm really chuffed about that..."

"Alright then...Sonya? " Nadjia turned to her

"Oh definitely...count me in"

"Briliant..." Clara chirped haply "Aaand it's our treat"

"No nooooo" Hakim jumped "Absolutely not Clara...you're not paying for all of us...don't worry We'll manage"

"Daaaaad" Yaz whined "Noooo...dad you paid for the wedding and for honeymoon...Come oooon I have a good job now it makes me happy to do this...Clara and me are gonna treat you...pleaseeee dad....pleaseeee...I never took you anywhere in my life"

"Pumpkin I really don't want you spending your money on us...besides you're married now...you have to think about other stuff...you know"

"What other stuff?"

"You know...kids and that stuff"

Clara almost choked on her juice

"Ooooh....ohhhh...noooo no kids now....not yet" Yaz said "There's time for that"

"You two are gonna have to draw straws who's gonna be pregnant" Sonya giggled

Clara's eyes widened so much she looked like they will pop out of her sockets. Yaz ignored her sister's comment and moved back to the subject of Christmas

"So Christmas people" Yaz said "It's a deal then...mum ask Nanny...I'd love her to come"

"Tell her Graham is gonna be there" Sonya laughed

Everyone started laughing

"Oh she danced with him all night at the wedding" Clara laughed

"Maybe she's got her eye on him" Hakim winked

"Talking about Nanny...why isn't she here?" Yaz asked

"She's having a checkup today at the clinic...she'll come later" Sonya said

"It was such a beautiful wedding" Nadjia said dreamy

"I don't think you cried so much in years mum" Yaz smiled

"Oh it was so emotional Yaz...my baby getting married..."

....

Yaz fell silent in the car on the way back. Clara turned and passed her hand over her knee, looking at her with a smile "Did you have a nice time?"

"Yeaaaah" she smiled back at her "Sonya loved her present"

"She did...and that cake was so nice Yaz...I didn't know you can make such nice cakes"

"Oh...well one thing I'm better at then before" she remarked sarcastically looking through the window

Clara pursed her lips and glanced at her then looked back on a road "Did I tell you about the time I met Ruth?"

"No...Who's Ruth?...Should I know that?"

"Ruth was me from the time I lost...one of the lives I don't remember...Anyway...See Ruth had skills I don't have...she was...well...one mean killing machine Yaz..."

"Whaaa?" She turned to her shocked

"Oh yeah...ripped a horn of Judoon without blinking...Took me a minute to find my brains when I saw that...Point being Yaz...she was one of the reasons I never opened that fob" she reached for her hand

"Why?...Why her?"

"I didn't like what I saw Yaz..." she smiled at her gently and brought her hand to her lips kissing her knuckles "When it came down to it Yaz...even though I'm missing so much of my life I  realized that I am who I am now...I didn't want that to change me...because it would...So you see...you may  be a little bit different now than what you were before because circumstances change us...mold us into who we are...But that doesn't make you any less now Yaz...in any way. In fact, maybe it even makes you more...You wouldn't love Ruth...if I was like her...She goes against everything this me believes...Now I'm not taking a higher ground Yaz...She was what life made her out to be and I don't know what that was...but it doesn't mean I want to or have to be that. I'm not even proud of some things I did, that I do remember....So you see love... you were what life made you out to be then...and you are what it makes you now....And I will always equally love both...Sometimes it's nice because I see parts of you I never got to see then"

"Such as?"

"You were not a potty mouth before..." she smiled "You certainly wouldn't tell me to fuck off...But I like that cheekiness about you now...and I wouldn't change it for anything...You're also so gentle now and I love it...The life we've had before made you though...Which isn't bad...because you had to be...But I love the soft and gentle side of you I didn't get to see a lot before. It was there but it didn't have chance to show so much as now" she brushed her knuckles over her face smiling

"Yeah...what about all the other stuff Clara...I'm nothing like I was. Not that I fucking remember... But by what you've told me I'm not even close to how I was...Everything I learned is no longer there like I had a fucking lobotomy Clara"

Clara turned into one of the streets and pulled the car onto a side of the road then turned twards her.

"Yaz honey...look at me baby"

Yaz turned around, her eyes filling with tears. Clara reached for her hands and rubbed the thumbs over them gently

"Yaz darling....I can teach you again...all of it...and you are as you were Yaz. Your not a different person...You just have no need to express certain parts of yourself...Don't you understand baby...this is why I told you about Ruth...I can obviously be the same as her...Ruth wasn't another person Yaz, she was very much me...So I am more than capable of being like that...Look what I did in a UNIT...that was terrifying Yaz...it is very much inside  me memory or not. And so are you...they didn't change who you are...you just don't need to fight Cyberman now...But believe me if you had to...you are more than capable. You didn't  hesitate  to pull that trigger when those men attacked  you....that's my Yaz...strong and brave and smart....But I don't  want that life for you anymore...I don't want that for us"

"It doesn't feel like it"

"It didn't feel like I was capable of doing what I did...and I very much did it Yaz...And it didn't  feel like you can pull that trigger but you did...Not that I want you go around  shooting people...you know what I think about guns...But you did what you had to do at that time to protect yourself. All the other things you can learn again...if you want to...But not for me honey...Don't ever do it for me because you think you need to be a certain way...I love you no matter what. You're so much more to me than knowing how to drive the Tardis...That's not why I fell in love with you...it's what's in your heart and that was never taken away from you. Nobody can take that away from you"

"This isn't easy Clara...I don't know who I am anymore"

"I know...believe me I do...But you're the same person butterfly...exactly the same as you were a month ago...exactly the same one you were 10 years ago...you're my Yaz...my beautiful Yaz...I'm not looking for anything more in you...I want you exactly how you are"

"I felt like an idiot..." she gasped and tears rolled down her cheeks

Clara reached out and wiped her face gently "Darling...I have lost so many people in my life I don't even know the number anymore I thought I'm gonna lose you. I just care about having you alive and well...that's all that matters to me...Do you understand that? We will work on this together...The most important thing for me is that I have you back. I've waited for so long just to see your face baby" Clara crumbled. Her voice started to shake, and she was desperately holding back her tears "I just want to feel you...like this" she laced their fingers together "To be able to touch you and have you around me....to laugh with you and travel and have fun together. That's all I want"

Yaz pursed her lips and her chin wobbled as she turned to Clara "I love you...So much"

"Huh" she gasped and wrapped  her fingers around her neck "C'mere here" she pulled her over and kissed her long and gentle " I Love you too butterfly" she said resting her head on hers "...just the way you are"

"The fucked up me" Yaz wiped her tears

"Hey...wanna go for ice-cream?" Clara smiled

"What now?"

"Yeah...why not? Got somewhere better to be?"

"Noooo" she smiled

"Well then...Come on let's go" she smiled and started the car again

....

As they walked through the door, they were still giggling like they would do many times before and it was a welcoming change for Clara to see her smiling again. She longed for it so much in a past month.

"Let me change and we can sit in a conservatory if you want.." Yaz said as she was about to climb the stairs, but Clara grabbed her hand lacing their fingers together "What? " she smiled as Clara tugged her hand and pulled her closer

"It's nice to see you smile again" she said wrapping her fingers around her face "We will go through this darling...I promise"

"I know...Deep down I do know that...It's hard...soo hard" she gulped trying not to cry

"I know...I know it is...I love you. I love you so so much" she said and kissed her gently then pulled her onto her chest "It's gonna be alright. And you know what else" she pulled her away and cupped her face "I will sort this mess out...all of it and we will have a beautiful life together you and I... You’ll see"

"I want that, Clara. I just want us and all our dreams"

"We will...We will butterfly. We will go and travel and I will show you all the amazing places" she stroke her face gently "And we will sit and look at the stars and I will take you to see the pink beaches"

Yaz smiled "You keep promising me that"

"I love you Yasmin more than anything in this universe"

"More than Tarids?" She giggled razing her eyebrow

Clara scrunched her face "Mmmmm...Tinker...You share my hearts"

"You're a smooth operator Doctor" she said and almost make Clara lose her breath "I love you too" she smiled and pulled her for her shirt into a kiss

...

"This is nice...we haven't done this in a while" Yaz said quietly as they leyed on a sofa in a conservatory looking at the stars in a night sky

"No...we really should come here more often"

"You happy about the lectures?"

"Yeah..." she grinned haply "I must say they will be refreshing change Yaz...Wanna come with me?"

"Actually..." she looked up at her smiling "I think I might"

Clara kissed the tip of her nose gently "It would make me happy to have you there...Only if you want to"

"I do baby" she snuggled back to her and reached for her hand playing with her fingers and placed her palm against hers "Promise me something"

"Anything"

"Promise me this will never happen again...And promise me you will help me to find myself again...I need this Clara...I need it for us both"

Clara closed her fingers around hers "I promise butterfly..."

Yaz looked up at her with longing in her eyes and kissed her slow and gentle

"Love you" Clara whispered into her lips

"Love you too...Hey look falling star" she smiled and pointed to the sky

"Make a wish....quickly"

"For us to stay together forever" she looked up to her

"Forever butterfly" Clara stroke her face gently

....

Yaz woke early to the sound of foxes outside. A faint light peaked through the closed curtains of their bedroom. Clara's hot breath at the back of her neck warmed her heart as she finally had a full night sleep after a long time. She turned in her arms and smiled as Clara scrunched her face in protest as light hit her face

"Mhaaaw" she mumbled and Yaz pressed a kiss to her rosy cheek then slipped her hand around her as Clara hid her face into her neck.

She could never understand how she could breathe like that because she would suffocate herself. But sleepy Clara was the sweetest thing, and she couldn't get enough of it. She lay awake for a while running her hand over Clara's soft skin. Now more than ever she had a desperate need for her like she hadn't felt this way before. But her nearness now comforted her more than any words. The feeling of home that Clara had given her from the beginning suddenly changed its meaning, but the strange feeling inside her did not leave her and she wondered if it ever would. The feeling of a forgotten past but not at the same time as now more than ever it was clear how much it had always been there somewhere underneath it all and she wondered what it must have been like for Clara. Having someone next to you whom you used to know, your soul mate, your lover, your life, but who doesn't remember a single moment you've spent together. She wondered what it was like for her to leave and be away for so many years and what it was like to finally see her after decades. It blew Yaz's mind and brought pain to her heart. So many things now fell into place, finally making some strange sense. But she wasn't sure she wanted that lost life and she feared that Clara's and her desires could go in different directions in the future. It all felt so fragile. She felt like she just got her, and now somehow, she might lose her. She was utterly lost in her mind not knowing which way to turn and this feeling made her anxious, scared and afraid to ask any questions about their past, desperately worried that it might emphasize how different she is now. She wasn't hungry for any adventures as much as she loved the Tardis this life was all she wanted, their home and life they were just starting to build.

Clara shifted and opened her sleepy eyes with a gentle smile. "Heeeey" she wiggled underneath the covers draping Yaz's leg over her hip

"Hey baby" Yaz stroke her rosie cheek

"Why are you awake? It's early"

"My mind is racing" she said with a sigh and brushed her fingertips over Clara's spine

Clara looked at her softly and ran her fingertip down her nose "It's alright butterfly...Love ya"

"Love you too" she said and kissed her gently

"I'm taking you on a date today...so you have to rest" Clara smiled

"I'm not sure I'm in a right set of mind for a date"

"Alright...I'm taking you some place really beautiful to set your mind in a right place" she giggled pulling her closer

"That could work" she smiled little

"But you need to sleep or my plan is totally gonna go bust"

"Ok...I'll try...I'm not promising anything though"

"Try is good...I can live with that"

"Clara"

"Mmmmm?"

Yaz reached for her hand underneath the covers and wrapped her fingers around her wrist "Pleaseeee...be with me...I need to feel you baby"

Clara's hearts were tearing in half to her desperate plead as her fingers stroke gently over the inside of her wrist. There was no desire or passion in her eyes just pure fear and sadness and Clara felt her throat tightening.

"Please don't beg me like that..." she showered her face with small kisses

"I just..."

"Shhhhh...just kiss me" she smiled gently "Kiss me like you did that night at the hotel"

Yaz smiled and brought her hand to her cheek watching as Clara's eyes closed slowly and pressed her lips at hers. She kissed her slow and passionate feeling her hand ran over her hip and down her sides. She moaned into her lips as Clara deepened her kiss driving air out of her lounges and whimpered into her lips as her fingers gently brushed over her. She rocked her hips in a desperate desire tangling her fingers into Clara's hair.

"Slowly" Clara whispered into her lips as she moved gently "Feel me..." she locked her eyes with hers and kissed her gently

"Mmmmm..." she moaned softly as her eyes closed and gripped the back of Clara's neck as she shifted hovering over her dotting kisses all over her face. She watched as Yaz slowly fell apart underneath her sinking into the mattress pulling her in and taking her lips in an endless chain as her chest heaved and her heart pounded "Please...baby..." she gasped and grabbed her side pulling her onto herself then cupped her face in her hands moving her hair behind her ears and wrapping her leg around her "Make us fly" she breathlessly kissed her

"Alright baby....I make us fly" Clara kissed her and moved to press against her watching Yaz exhale as her hands trailed ever so gently down her chest and over her arms. She watched her slowly lose herself and twist with each turn of her hips

I love you" Yaz's eyes opened in a daze and she ran her thumb over Clara's lips as the fingers of her other hand gripped her hip pulling her in.

Clara leaned over kissing her open mouth with a smile as Yaz's fingers gripped her hand and she shuddered underneath her

"Don't stop" she moaned into her lips and ran her hand over her shoulders

Clara closed her eyes and wrapped her fingers around Yaz's neck chasing her own high, feeling her stomach churn and heat flush her cheeks as she moved at a steady pace, her knuckles turning white as she grabbed the headboard letting it wash over her. Yaz ran her hand over her chest and planted a long kiss between her breasts as she lowered herself and rested her head on hers breathing deeply. She felt the muscles tremble under her palm on her thigh. They fell silent for a moment, kissing gently

"Come lay on me," Yaz smiled, moving the messy hair from Clara's flushed face

"I'll need some water in a minute" she smiled and kissed her moving lazily to her usual spot as Yaz tightened her legs around her

"And food I know" she smiled pulling a duvet over their heads and running her fingernails down Clara's back gently

"Definitely food....and a shower..." she giggled

"You wanted more sleep now I woke you up" she giggled

"I'm gonna blame you when I fall asleep at the wheel and we end up in a dich..." she giggled

"Well I still need to pack us...I suppose we can lie down in the afternoon"

"Unless I'll have to do my marital duties again" Clara laughed playing with her hair twirling her curls between her fingers

"Oi... since when are those duties?"

"Got ya" she grinned

....


They were halfway to Oxford and Yaz fell asleep as usual resting her head on a little travel pillow Clara got her when they went to Rome. It was still very early and fresh morning air came through the slightly opened window. It was keeping Clara awake. She felt unusually tiered this morning and assumed that sleepless nights were catching up with her. Even her body needed some sleep, but she was recently having very little of it having to work most nights still trying to figure out the little cube she was given last time she saw Jack. This time something else was travelling with her as well. It took three days but she managed to connect her Tardis to her laptop so she could monitor all the information from the scanner. It was also her lifeline to Jack who was relentlessly following the map she gave him which made her feel extremely anxious. The fact that she still had no clue who these people were or where they came from gave her little to no hope of ever finding Jack if something ever happened to him. It was a scary thought. After all the decades she had spent searching for clues she was tired, mentally, utterly drained, and exhausted. And even though Yaz seemed fine on the outside she was very much aware she wasn't on the inside. She was a ticking bomb and Clara had no clue how to defuse it. It was slowly driving her crazy and making her feel more and more as though she was incapable of resolving it. She heard the beeping from the car passing her on a road and jolted releasing she was swerving off the road falling asleep at the wheel.

"Woooow" she shook her head and straitened the car waking up Yaz

"Whaa!" Yaz yelled jumping
"It's alright Yaz" she turned to her quickly and stroke her leg "I need to stop"

"Why...what happened?"

"I feel asleep darling we almost flew off the road" she said pulling the window down

"OMG.. Clara darling stop off somewhere and then I'm gonna drive" she took her phone out to find any place which was close

"Yeah...Well that was close....Blimey"

"Oh Clara....You need to sleep darling...There's a petrol station coming up"

"I know it's two minutes and 30 seconds away"

"This is not healthy"

"I know...I know Yaz"

"Why do you work nights?...You're now on vacation you can work during the day...I told you I will help you"

"Oh nooooo....you will not do anything now Yaz...you have your own mess in your head darling...Besides you need me...you're in no state"

"I do need you but I also need you alive...and I mean in this body when I say that"

"Here....this will do" she switched lanes "I need coffee...I need to reboot my brains"

"You need sleep is what you need...And you haven't had any breakfast either"

"There was no time Yaz" she said as she was parking

"Make time"

Clara fumbled with her bag and pulled the sonic out scanning herself "Mmmm...I need sugar"

"And few other things...come on" she opened the car door

"Like what?" Clara frowned

"Some sense" Yaz said closing the door

"I'm sensible"

Yaz lifted her eyebrow "Oh yeah...prove it"

"Aaaahaaaa!" she jumped "....Seee...that...that thing right there!" she pointed a finger at her walking half hunched next to her making Yaz laughe

"What thing?" Yaz frowned confused laughing

"That was your old self right there" she said exited walking backwards infront of her

"Whaaaaaa?" Yaz giggled

"Yeah...you'd challenge me like this all the time Yaz....that's you all over...So see...not gone...still here" she said smug draping her arm over her shoulder and kissed her cheek so hard she squished it

"You silly sod"

"Just saying...Uuuu I do fancy a sandwich...and a brownie"

"Looks like it will rain"

Clara licked her finger and lifted her arm up "Neah...it's passing us...it'll be gone in about an hour....Also it smells like salt...I can smell sea"

"What from here?"

"Mmmm...and taste it" she reached for her hand as they walked inside

"Brownies!" she jumped "Want one?"

"Yeah definitely...You've woken up"

"Fresh air did me a world of good Yaz"

"I'm still driving"

"Alright...don't get your nickers in a twist....Sandwich?"

"Noooo....or yes...I don't knoooow...they do look nice"

"They do and they have tuna...you love tuna"

"A bit early for tuna but that one with mozzarella looks yummy"

They picked their food and sat by the window

"Can I ask you something?" Yaz said putting a straw on her juice

"Always"

"Were we like this before"

"I'm not sure I understand what you mean Yaz"

"Us two together...was it the same and I'm not now talking about how I was...I mean you and me together....God this is so awkward..."

"Why is it awkward darling?"

"Because for you that happened...You know all of it...I just have a fucking blank....in my mind I met in November Clara. This feels like someone roofed me"

"I know...I'm so sorry...But you never know butterfly...maybe by talking about it it will start coming back...like all those other things you saw"

"I hope so...cause this is so fucking out there Clara more than me finding out you're a fucking alien...Pleaseeee tell me I wanna know"

"Honest...I dunno Yaz...yes and no...Our life was different so we never got time to do some stuff we do now...Like cuddle watching TV"

"Ok...did we go on dates?" she smiled

"Oi...Of course we went on dates" she said smug

"Did we cook together?"

"Arrrhhh not that much...Sometimes we did"

"Did you take me to see castles?"

"Noooo not really" she scrunched her face "I did take you to Egypt and Sumer and you met Mary Shelley though that one didn't go that well...and that wasn't a date"

"What was it?"

"Arrrh....maybe we should leave that one for some other time Yaz"

"Right" she frowned "Why?"

"I knew you're gonna ask that" Clara put her sandwich down "It was meant to be fun but we sort of ended up in the middle of a Cyberman genocide and then we got separated for a year"

"Whaaaa?"

"I did tell you we should drop it"

"Why did we get separated?"

"You're not gonna leave this one are you?"

"I'm interested"

"So for a month you hardly ask anything then you pick that..."

"Mmmmm" she shrugged "Go on...tell me"

"Nooooo...drop it...we can talk about something nice...Besides we weren't dating then....So it doesn't fall under your original question" she waived her hand and took her sandwich back

"Did we argue"

"We always argue....Everyone argues"

"Why did we get separated?"

"Stars Yaz" she put her sandwich down again "Cause...I've sent you back to Earth so I can detonate the death particle on Gallifrey to destroy the Master and Cyber Masters and things just...well didn't go to plan...I sort of got banged up by Judoon for 25 years and when Jack got me out Tardis was a sleep for too long so I sort of missed a year....Happy? Now I lost my appetite"

"I was pissed off? Right? I was, right? Cause if I was anything like now, I'd fucking kill you myself"

Clara pouted her lips "You shoved me...So yeah you were pissed off...In fact you were so mad at me I thought you'd leave"

"OMG...did this happen a lot?"

"Yaaaaz! Are we gonna only talk about our problems?"

"Did we have many?"

"Oh for the love of Tardis" she dropped her sandwich on a table and took her coffee "Ewwwww....arrrthh...forgot sugar"

Yaz burst out laughing. She was laughing so much it made Clara laugh.

"Tinker" she said laughing

"I knew you're hiding something"

"Oh yeah...how?"

"You have this twitch in a corner of your lip when you don't wanna say something"

"Whaaat...a twitch?"

"Yeah...you can't help it...then I know you're hiding something and you purse your lips like this" she imitated her

Clara died laughing and threw a s sugar packet at her

....

As soon as they hit the road again Clara fell asleep. Yaz glanced at her and moved a little blanket over her. She slept all the way to Oxford and didn't even flinch when Yaz parked in front of the hotel.

"Baby...Wake up darling we arrived" Yaz brushed her knuckles over her cheek

"Mmmmwha?" she opened her eyes disorientated

"We're in Oxford darling"

"Are we?"

"Yeah" she smiled "You went straight out and slept all the way. I even stopped for a toilet"

"Wooow" she rubbed her face sleepy and sat up

"Please after this lecture come straight back to a hotel and sleep...I think you've burnt out"

"Mmmmm....I think you might be right Yaz...Come on...let's get a shift on...I need to be there in less then an hour" she said with a yawn

Clara went straight to the reception and got their key "Hey Yaz guess what the reservation says"

"What?"

"Clara and Yasmin Sigma" she grinned

"OMG of course..." she smiled

"First time here as my wife" she said smug twirling a key in her hand

Yaz giggled all the way to the elevator
Clara rolled the suitcase into the room and started unbuttoning her shirt straight away.

"I'm so late...and I need a shower"

Yaz lied on a bed watching her as she was taking her clothes off in a hurry.

"You're falling asleep yourself Yaz...Go to bed I won't be long. I only have one lecture and I'll come back. We can rest then go out later" she said tangling herself into her underwear as she was rushing into the shower

"Mmmmm..." Yaz mumbled

"Yaz come on...get your shoes off...go to bed" Clara said and closed the cubicle door

Clara left and Yaz changed into her pajamas. She was lying in bed looking through the window. For the first time in a month, she felt a little bit more confident that everything is going to be alright.

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