Chapter 3
Yaz was still in her pajamas when the interphone rang. She fell asleep and got up scrambling around, jumping over some stuff on a floor and ran to press the buzzer and waited by the open door.
"Morning" she smiled from the stars "I got us breakfast" she lifted the bag haply
"Oh you're a star...I just realized I have no bread I was gonna go to a corner shop but I fell asleep"
"That's alright...I'm up since seven"
"Jesus...come in" she stepped back to let her inside
"Aaaaaa...purple sofa"
"I know...tacky right"
"Nooo...I love it..."
"I bet you just say that...in fact I bet your whole apartment is in badge?"
"How did you know that?" she turned around confused
"You're a doctor...it comes with a territory...posh and all that" she giggled
"Oh I assure you I'm everything but posh...just not good with colors so I make it easier...What should I?" she lifted the bag up
"Oh...give it here.." she hopped towards her and took a bag popping it on a kitchen counter
"So what did you get?" Yaz peaked inside the bag "OMG did you buy the whole store?"
"It all looked nice..." she came to the kitchen "I wasn't sure what you want so I just bought one of each"
"I think we can open up a bakery" Yaz giggled and started taking stuff out when Alex gently took one of packets out of her hand and placed it on a counter then went back to her hand lacing their fingers together. Yaz felt the floor opening underneath her. She didn't say anything since Alex came nor did she want a repeat from last night so she already made a decision to leave the next move to Alex. She kept looking at the their fingers as Alex almost played with them gently and felt a finger underneath her chin gently razing her gaze. Her chest was rising as her heart was pumping so hard it was becoming hard for her to breathe. She slowly placed her hand on Alex's waist almost balancing herself not to fall as their eyes met in perfect silence.
Alex raised her hand moving little curls from her face as her eyes were roaming around her face. Yaz was breathing heavily watching her wordlessly and felt fingers wrapping themselves at the back of her neck. Her eyes slamming shut as it was impossible for her to keep them open. She felt her close, she could feel her breath on her lips for a short moment before the hand on a back of her neck gripped her harder pulling her in just a little before their lips touched. They were there just barley making a contact before pressing themselves to her. And a hand that laced their fingers released slipping around her waist pulling her in. She parted her lips letting herself go bringing her hand to nape of Alex's neck. Taking her in as she kissed so deeply she felt her legs giving up on her. She grabbed the sleeve of her shirt and sunk into her arms trying to remember to breathe between the endless chain of kisses that followed. By the time they parted with a small smile she rested her head against hers completely breathless.
"Remind me never to challenge you again" Yaz said making them both smile as Alex placed a small kiss on her forehead
"Told you I can do better" she giggled wrapping arms around her waist and Yaz fell into her embrace
"I'm sorry for last night...I would never want to make you feel uncomfortable" she said tucking her hair behind her ears as she spoke holding herself from crying
"You didn't...and I know you never would....Let's have some food I'm starving" she said with a massive smile across her face
"Alright" Yaz nodded and they pulled apart
As she started taking stuff out of the bag Alex placed a small kiss to the side of her head as she reached over for butter.
As they prepared breakfast Alex kept glancing over at Yaz from time time. And she couldn't help but smile as the thought kept jumping out all the time. She actually had a girlfriend. It was making her so emotional she had to stop herself from busting into tears so instead she had a stupid grin across her face that wouldn't leave. And kept rambling about how the first croissants were maid.
"Yaz..."
"Yes" she asked putting the plates in the sink
"Why do you have a whole apartment full of police telephone boxes?" she asked confused looking at endless shelfs all the way up to the ceiling filled with all kinds of figurines, books, and strange looking creatures
"I'm a whovian" she smiled from the kitchen over her shoulder
"The what?"
"Doctor Who?" she said but Alex still had a blank expression
"The TV show....the Doctor....Daleks...Gallifrey. Doesn't ring any bells?"
"I think I may head that at some point"
"OMG...have you been living under a rock girl?"
"Must have done Yaz...sorry. But between my medical university and private life stuff I didn't really have much time for a tv"
"Oh..Well I take you to con if you want...it's at the end of the month. I think you might like that. We get dressed up"
"What's a con?" she scrunched her face twirling the telephone box in her hand looking inside as the doors could open on it
Yaz laughed as she came out of the kitchen "Comicon darling" she smiled "And that telephone box is a really cool time ship that is bigger on the inside
"Bigger on the inside?"
"Yeah like from the outside it's a telephone box but inside is this massive ship"
"Aaaaaaa...like dimensional engineering?"
"You're the smart one out of the two of us" she laughed "So let's get packing"
"Yes...."
….
"How much junk did your ex have?" she looked at the broken keyboard
"Told you....I have no space in my wardrobe from all this stuff. Did you ever live with someone?"
"You mean apart from my family? No I haven't Yaz" she said dumping the stuff into a massive suitcase
"Oh...well I haven't before...this was a poor attempt"
"Would you like to again?"
"Yes...absolutely...I wanna get married and everything...you?"
"That would be a dream Yaz"
"Then that makes us on same page..." she smiled "OMG...what's that?" she pulled a tangled bunch of wires out from the chest of drawers
Two hours later all the stuff was in the suitcase by the door and they were cleaning the whole apartment. She gave Alex some shorts and a t-shirt to change into as they were both boiling inside. And Yaz opened all the windows but only steamy hot air came inside. Alex was hoovering around whilst Yaz putting her clothes back neatly after she could finally clean the whole place properly.
"I think I'm done" Alex said switching off the hoover and puffin hair from her face that was bright red
"Thank for this" Yaz came over squishing her face between her palms and kissed her
"This more kissing than I got in three years" she said happily
"You look like you're gonna combust"
"I do feel a bit dizzy"
"OMG..why are you not saying anything...Wanna take a shower?"
"Oh...Imuh" she got flustered
"Oh, I didn't mean...I meant alone" Yaz said nervously "I'll give you some towels...you need to cool down" she hopped to the wardrobe
"Oh...aarh...yeah that would be nice"
"Here...Make yourself at home"
Alex took the tows and then turned at the door "Hey....I was thinking...we could order a pizza"
"Yes...you read my mind. I can do that whilst you take a shower...What do you want?"
"Anything but mushrooms...I'm allergic"
"Alright" she smiled
Alex walked into the bathroom. She was so hot she started to feel dizzy and was standing in a shower for a long time cooling herself down until she finally felt normal again. It was a lot of work but there was no place she would rather be more than right where she was. The excitement inside of her hasn't settled yet as past week was so beautiful and yet so stressful for her in so many ways. They only knew each other for several days and never has she moved so fast, a concept that was so scary for her in so many ways, that now all she wanted was to slow down and give herself time to breathe and ease into it. She could only hope Yaz would feel the same as she was far from ready for anything more than what it was now. It felt like the worst of it was over, but now she's being thrown a new challenge, the one she never had to deal with before. She was scared and panicky inside, fearful she will not know how to handle this and ultimately lose it the same way she always has. But she was 40 and felt her life was slipping through her fingers, and whilst she watched hundreds of happy couples walk through her clinic each day her loneliness was brutally rubbed into her face. There were days when it was hard to love yourself when you felt so out of place as though the word you're living in was some strange planet you don't belong to. She wanted so desperately to feel what they feel and couldn't help but feel like a failure in spite all the diplomas hanging on her walls. She felt like she was failing at the most simpler of all the things that others took for granted. So she was determined to make this chance work even if meant testing herself on every possible level. She stepped out of the shower and wiped the steam of the mirror wrapping herself in a towel.
"Hey" she walked back into the living room with a wet curly hair
"OMG....your hair is curly?" Yaz smiled
"Arh...yes...naturally it is...I'm also not blonde" she smiled "Well...not this blonde anyway"
"It's cute...I like it either way...Feel better?"
"Yes...much better"
"Do you need anything else? Deodorant something? Just say...I know you don't have your toiletries here"
"Well...I could use deodorant as it goes" she said squirming embarrassed
"Sure...don't be shy asking" Yaz got up and went to the wardrobe "I have a new one I just bought...here"
"Thanks...I appreciate it"
"I ordered a pizza" she said and went to kitchen "Want some juice?"
"Yes please" she said as she sat in a sofa crossing her legs "Yaz...can we talk"
"Yes...sure...what's up?" She passed her a glass and sat down opposite her "Is everything alright?"
"Yes...more than alright...in fact this is what I wanted to talk to you about"
"Alright" Yaz said worried starting to panic inside
"See I never really had this...I mean I had something...but it was different and I was different and it was so messed up...I'm rambling again aren't I?"
"That's ok...I'm not going anywhere...take your time"
"What I'm trying to say is that I'm so happy with this...now...all of it...I really am...but I'm not ready to you know...I will with time but not just now"
"You mean you and I?"
"Mmmm"
"Nooo...god no no...I absolutely do not sleep with people after four days...never happened...Wasn't even in a back of my head"
"Oh...alright because...I'm not saying no...absolutely not....I'm just not ready"
"Hey" Yaz reached for her hand "I'm not either alright...I know I jumped at you in a car but that's just noooot me...I don't know who that was. Hey I thought I'll fucking choke there in a kitchen....Now that's me...that's me all over..."
Alex giggled relieved "So you're fine we take it slow from here?"
"Yes...yes...absolutely hundred percent fine...was that why you got so nervous when I said shower?"
"Yeees" she covered her face with her hand laughing nervously
"Oh fuck...I really have a talent in making you feel like you wanna jump out of your skin...Noooo Alex...Listen" she moved up the sofa closer to her and moved her hand from her face "Hey...I'll say stupid stuff and come up with probably some really idiotic things"
"That's me Yaz...I'm a queen of that"
"It seems like we both are" she laughed "I just want us to be able to talk. Say things and be honest...like now...and I'm sure we will be fine"
Alex raised her hand on the side of her neck "I want this to work...I really do...You made me more happy in four days than I was in a past several years"
"And you me...I feel the same" she reached for her wrist "I really want this...but I don't want to rush it...I want to enjoy it"
"Me too" she brushed her thumb on side of her neck
The buzzer startled them both "Pizza" Alex smiled and Yaz ran for the door
"I was thinking" Alex said taking the plates out of the cabinet "What's your plan for tomorrow evening?"
"You if you're free" Yaz smiled putting a pizza on a table
"Brilliant ...because I'm taking you on that cheese date" she put the plates on the table leaning over placing a kiss on her lips
"Alright" she giggled "so do dress for sprinting or for dinner"
"I think dinner is less challenging" she sat down next to her "Arh...I don't want olives...I hate them hot"
"Have you ever been to Italy?"
"Yes many times...you?"
"No"
"Ok...well I'm writing it down then...I do have a holiday next month"
"Are you saying what I think you're saying?" Yaz looked at her surprised
"I'm saying exactly what you think I'm saying Yaz...wanna go to Italy?"
"No fucking way? Really?" she wiggled on a sofa turning towards her
"Well" she said putting a slice of pizza on a plate "It would be really silly for me to go on my own now I have you...and you already have a bag packed with your bikini" she laughed and glanced over to her grinning
"Put that plate down"
"Whaaa?"
Yaz grabbed the plate out of her hands and left it on a table rhen squeezed her face between her palms showering her with kisses making her giggle as she tipped them on a sofa
….
Evening came and Yaz played the movie. Alex made popcorn in the kitchen because she insisted that freshly made at home is much better than pre-made from a packet. A bit of fresh summer air finally came into the room, seemingly cooling it down after the relentless heat all day long.
"I really should have air-conditioning...I never know summers to be so hot in UK" Yaz said standing by the window enjoying in a cool air.
"Global warming...you can really feel it last few years" Alex said bringing the popcorn "Here it is...try...just don't burn your fingers"
"Mmmm...that is better"
"Told ya" she smiled
Yaz sat on a sofa leaning on a pile of cushions against the headrest and opened her arms smiling "Cuddle?"
"Definitely" Alex smiled and settled herself resting her back placing the popcorn bowl on her tummy "I like this...it's cozy"
Yaz smiled and kissed the top of her head then reached for the remote.
As the evening wore on, Yaz felt herself becoming more and more emotional. She didn't want it to end or let her go. They spent a wonderful day together, their first as a couple. An information that was still simmering somewhere in her mind and was still so surreal. She ran lazily lines down her arm and buried her face in her hair that smelled of her shampoo and was so soft and silky. Alex reached for her other hand, lacing their fingers and moved more to the side, pressing their hands on her chest.
"I don't want you to go" Yaz whispered and rubbed her face into her hair
Alex kissed her knuckles then shuffled on a sofa until her face was only inches away and kissed the top of nose "I don't wanna go"
"You don't?" Yaz said moving her hair behind her ears and stroking her face gently
She nodded in silence
"Then stay...just sleep next to me...that's all I want" Yaz said quietly still stroking her hair and felt Alex's hand slipping around her waist and her lips drawing closer to hers until they touched ever so gently melting into a a kiss
"Alright" she whispered and draped her leg over her sides
"Was that a yes?" Yaz asked exited
"That was a yes...but I have to get up early and go home...I don't have my medication here"
"Yes...yes...absolutely" she showered her with kisses
"Wanna finish the movie now?" she smiled rubbing their noses together
"Mmmm...now when I can concentrate on it" she giggled
"I'm happy Yaz" she said roaming her gaze over her face and running fingertips down Yaz's spine gently "You really make me happy"
"You make me happy...soo much I can't tell you...I haven't felt like this in a looong time and it's nice. You make me feel myself that I forgot"
she said kissing her gently
"When I'm with you Yaz...I feel safe to be me...does that make sense?"
"Perfect sense" she smiled stroking her hair "You're so beautiful you know that"
Alex smiled scrunching her face then kissed her gently. They finished the movie and Yaz was digging through the wardrobe for the extra pair of pajamas
"Here you go...also...wait..." she hopped to the bathroom and went through the cabinet "Toothbrush...you're in luck...it was on action two for one" laughed "If there's anything else you need just tell me"
"I will need some hair straighteners in the morning" she laughed
"I have that as well but you look cute as you are"
Alex changed her clothes and crawled under the covers. She never slept in someone's bed or next to someone. It was strange, but also beautiful and something she wanted. Yaz was in the shower so she set her alarm for morning and left her phone on the small side table then turned off the light lying on her side looking out the window above Yaz's desk. She heard her come out of the bathroom and the only light in the room turned off. Suddenly her heart raced as the bed lowered and her mind began to race in some sort of strange panic and anxiety that kept her from turning around. She felt herself shaking, then embarrassed that she was acting like a 40-year-old teenager. She felt a gentle hand on her shoulder and finally turned around.
"Hey" she smiled nervously
"Hey..." Yaz smiled as only light from the street shined on her face and she looked at her half hovering above her
"Yaz"
"Yes"
"Can you just hold me?"
She nodded smiling "Yes I'd love to hold you" she lied down and Alex wrapped herself around her tucking her face in crook of her neck
"I might snore" she said into her neck making her burst out laughing
"I can deal with that" she giggled
Alex raised her gaze "I'm sorry...I'm so nervous..."
"That's fine..."
"I want to be here...I do...I just need to have a serious conversation with my brain"
Yaz laughed and kissed her forehead "As long as you wanna be here that's the most important to me...I can wait for your brain" she giggled
Alex snuggled back into her neck and they feel silent. Yaz felt her falling asleep but she was way too nervous to fall asleep herself. So she just watched the lights from the road and ran her hand down Alex's back until she fell asleep herself.